Kiasumom

Super moms!

2012-01-30T09:58:00.007+08:00

When Zac was a few months old a friend of mine introduced me to a Breastfeeding Network on Facebook. The members on this network helps and encourage each other on breastfeeding and discuss and share knowledge on how to give the best to our babies. Gina Yong, the famous breastfeeding guru is also on this network and she is quite active in giving advices too.

When I started reading the posts on this network, it made me feel like crappy mom. Some of the moms are really amazing I tell you. I just don't know how they did what they did. Here are some of the things that made me go 'WHOAAAAAAA.........'. Let me know if you feel the same too :)

Most of them breastfed their babies exclusively until they are 3 or 4! Some even continue to breastfeed several kids (eg feeding the 3 and 4 year olds while still pregnant with the next one).
Some of these mothers have so much milk that they actually 'donate' their milk to babies in orphanages or use their milk to make breast milk soap.
Some of the mothers are also strongly against vaccinations, even the compulsory ones. I know of one who had 3 kids (pregnant with No 4) and all her kids have not been jabbed before, not a single one. She claimed that all these vaccinations actually make the babies sick. According to her (she said she made a lot of research herself), babies are born healthy and all these vaccinations with chemical contents that are actually harmful to small babies who cannot tolerate them will only make them worst. Also according to her, her kids have never been seriously sick, just the usual flu and cough and they usually heal very fast and they have NEVER been to the doctors. She however do supplement her kids with Vit C and VCO (Virgin Coconut Oil). Whenever the kids are not well, she will boost their Vit C intake, that's all.

So, are you feeling crappy yet?

I have given my kids all the jabs in the world (kiasi), even the not compulsory ones and now I felt like I have failed my kids by injecting them with poisons and not to mention those antibiotics they have taken due to their sensitive throat since they were babies.

Although I hate going in there to read the posts (as they make me feel crappy) but it honestly does provide a lot of useful tips and infor in bringing up kids the healthy way. I am surely going to get some of those Vit Cs and VCOs for my kids now :)

Zac's update: 14+ months

2012-01-29T08:39:00.008+08:00

At 14+ months, I:

am finally walking :)
have added a couple more words to my vocab: a-ti (aunty), ish (fish), if (give), however my pronounciation is still a bit off and only my mummy can understand me mostly for now
am getting more demanding and I also love to test the limits of my parents (driving them nuts :-))
love to eat (eat anything and everything) but dislike drinking water
love shaking my butt to music
love going kai kai (going out) and will often point to the door and demand to be carried out of the house. If my papa who is usually shirtless at home puts on his shirt, I know he's going out and I'll stick to him like glue
am more focus and can play a new toy by myself for quite a while (so unlike my sister, according to my mom)
also inherited my mom's sensitive throat, I often get sore throat that requires antibiotics :(
still have my usual swelling on the cheek but it is getting less obvious now that I am growing up

Zac's Update: 13+ months

2011-12-26T10:23:00.004+08:00

At 13+ months, I:

am still not walking yet but love to stand
can say a couple more words such as: bird, ceh ceh
love nursery rhymes. Will clap my hands everytime mummy finished singing my favourite 'twinkle twinkle little star' and 'Old MacDonald had a farm'.
love to copy everything I see around me, when mummy roars like a lion, I would roar too, when mummy pretends to be a monkey (with both hands on the chest scratching) I would follow too (I even copied the hands), when popo uses the spoon to balance a plastic cup, I would do the same. I just love to copy everything I see :-)
I have quite a character, mummy said I have a bad temper and am a pretty rough boy
still have my usual swelling

Playing staring game with with one of the ceh ceh. Look at the size of my head and forehead! Mummy said I look like a flowerhorn fish - no wonder the doctor had to use a forcep to get me out of her tummy even when it was a c-sec...

Singapore Zoo (Part 4)

2011-12-18T13:33:00.004+08:00

This a a 'must go' place everytime we're in Singapore. The zoo :-). So this time no exception. Singapore zoo is a great place, very child friendly and clean. We can easily spend more than half a day here looking at animals, playing at the water park area and just chilling out.

S$5 per bowl of carrots (about 5 carrots)

Singapore Flyer (Part 3)

2011-12-18T13:15:00.005+08:00

Papa took Hayley to Singapore Flyer on a Friday when I was at work. Again the entrance fee is not cheap, adult is S$29.50 and kid (3 and above) is S$20.65. The entire circle took about 30 mins (according to papa). After the flyer they walked to Marina Bay.

Universal Studios (Part 2)

2011-12-18T12:00:00.006+08:00

During our Singapore trip, one of the day was spent at USS. The USS trip was a year end event organised by my company for the staff and therefore my ticket is paid for, Hayley is under 4 so it's free and we paid for papa's. The ticket is not cheap though, S$72 per adult and because we bought more than 30 tickets at a go, they gave us corporate discounts. Guess how much? S$4 wor....sigh....

Anyway, just wanted to say the place is great, kids and adults will love it. Lots of rides, lots of places to spend money and lots of entertainment along the street. We went on a Saturday so it was a bit crowded and queues for rides were slightly long (2 hours for Transformers). Other than the Transformers and The Mummy ride, the rest of the rides are suitable for kids (some requires adult supervision).

I'll let the photos do all the talking :-)

Steven Spielberg introducing his movies and special effects (Jurassic park, ET)

We're waiting for the hurricane. When it finally hit, it was quite real and interesting with wind, water, fire and even a ship crashing into us effect.

The ultimate ride in 3D, this ride is SUPER cool

Hayley's ride

Waterworld show, another great entertainment

Watching Shrek in 4D, we got spat at by the donkey and even have spiders

climbing up our legs.. so darn real

Waiting for her roller coaster, although it was considered a mild one to most people, I was still scared when it was over but she said 'mom, this was fun!'....

Shrek and Fiona dating

Singapore trip (Part 1)

2011-12-18T10:55:00.006+08:00

This year my company decided to organise a family day out at USS and a year end party at a restaurant in Sentosa Boardwalk. So off we go again to Singapore in December 2011. Our first time (the 3 of us) to Singapore was back in Dec 2009. This time Zac was left at the babysitter's for a couple of days cause we didn't want to stress him out as we know we'll be out the whole day :(. Reni was left at my aunty's.

As the airfare for the 3 of us in Dec was quite expensive, we decided to drive. The journey took us about 4 hours and with the help of a GPS, we managed to find our way in Singapore pretty easily.

At Vivo City

Kids dressed as elves at our company's year end dinner party (Hayley and Minyu)

Some rich man's car

On the way back, we stopped by at JPO. Some of the stuff at JPO were much cheaper than in Singapore. So many people were seen queuing at the Coach outlet (insane). There are still plenty of shops not opened and even that the place is already pretty crowded.

More photos on the places we visited in Singapore in the next few posts, USS, Singapore Zoo and Singapore Flyer. So enjoy :)

Another hair pulling moment

2011-12-09T22:05:00.003+08:00

Since last week I have been tortured emotionally and mentally by my 3 year old girl. SHE REFUSED TO EAT!

It has been almost a week now and she still refused to eat. This is what I am going through everyday:

Morning (8am) - made her a bottle of milk, usually 7oz and she will finish half only

Breakfast (10 ish) - refused to eat anything

Lunch (1pm) - when we're preparing rice she will say she already had her food and she's not hungry. We'll force her to eat the food and she will sulk and pretend to vomit and will insist that we give her small spoons only otherwise she will throw up (small as in 1/3 of a teaspoon!). We'll struggle to make her finish about half a bowl of rice. Sometimes we just give up after a few spoons cause she will start crying, and we'll start losing our temper etc.

Tea (3pm) - another bottle of milk, sometimes she won't finish

Dinner (6pm) - similar struggle as per lunch

Last milk feed (9pm) - she usually will fnish this one but sometimes insist that we make her just half a bottle.

I am really upset. Why did she suddenly become like this? She used to love her milk and will eat whatever we eat. What makes her change so suddenly? It will be easier if we give her junk food as in ice cream, chocolate, McDonalds etc. She will take them with no problems.

I've de-wormed her 2 weeks ago, will the de-worm cause loss of appetite? It doesn't look like it cause she will finish the entire ice cream so her appetite is definitely there, just that she's selective of what she wants to eat. I brought her to the doctor cause I was really worried and he said de-worming will not usually cause loss of appetite but he said it could still be a possibility.

The doctor also asked if there was anything else that we've changed in her life in the last few weeks prior to this new 'phase'. The only other thing we did was that we've stopped sending her to the babysitter since Reni arrived. Could this have caused her to be emotionally upset and hence this horrible phase to get our attention?

I have tried talking to her, asking her what was wrong but all she said was 'I don't want big mouth' ie referring to small amount when we feed her. She did not tell me anything else.

I am going to lose my mind very soon. Should I just let her starve until she ask me for food????

What should I do?????? I am just worried that she will fall ill if this goes on.

Zac's update: 12+ months

2011-11-28T09:54:00.008+08:00

At 12+ months, I:

occasionally can stand unsupported, if I am forced to walk or stand, I will do it on tip-toe,
can finally crawl on 4, can crawl pretty fast too
have 6 teeth, 4 lower, 2 upper
can say a couple of words: papa, mum mum, tar tar
am very expressive, will show different facial expressions for different situations - when mummy scold me I will pretend to cry (tearless), when ceh ceh snatch my toys I will wail and yell, when I want to be carried I will make a lot of noise until someone come to my rescue (mummy said I am very predictable)
still have the swelling on my left cheek, same old same old

Had my 1 year old jab on 2nd Nov. Met with Dr Choy who has been my paeditrician since I was born. This is the first time Dr Choy has seen my swelling (mummy did not consult him in the past because mummy thought he won't know) and Dr Choy gave mummy a pretty interesting diagnostic. Dr Choy said what I have looks like a type of 'Infantile Hemangioma' - swelling with slight bluish discoloration on the skin and warm to touch. He said he has seen several cases like these before and so far he is the only doctor who was able to give mummy a name of the condition I am having.

Dr Choy said what I have looks pretty mild and hopefully it remains at this size if it won't go away on its own (still too early to tell). He said there are several types of treatment:

Laser which he does not encourage based on the size of the growth as well as my age
Taking a type of high blood pressure medication in a controlled manner to thin the blood and hopefully unclog the blood veins. This I can try if mummy wants to. It is quite safe.
An operation which he strongly discourage as he said what I have is actually swelling at the blood veins and any surgery might cause heavy blood loss.

He advised mummy and papa to monitor for a few more months or maybe a year as he said some will will go away on its own in a few years. Some might remain but looking at the size of my growth, he said it looks pretty ok, not that disfiguring. He did however advised us to be cautious as not to cut my cheek and injure the blood veins.

As the swelling is not as obvious as it used to be, mummy and papa decided to let it be and continue to monitor.

More on Reni

2011-11-26T12:17:00.005+08:00

Over the last few days, more requests and comments from Reni...

Asked me to buy her skin lotion. I told her sure, but I will deduct from her paycheck because I do not supply anything else other than the daily essential items. Then she said no need. Will she use the lotion in my room when I am not around, I am not sure.
Even before I said anything (my washing machine broke recently) she told me she cannot wash the big items like bedsheets and curtains using hands.
Asked me and hubby if we have Facebook account. Are you scared yet? I am. I did a quick search but could not find her name in Facebook.
Told me she doesn't want to bath or feed Zac as he is too young, she is scared. Said she fed her boy twice and the boy choked and end up hospitalised. Why do I have this feeling that she is just giving excuses so she won't have to do so much?
Got my washing machine fixed today and she asked me what time she should wash the clothes? Told her no washing clothes using machine. Machine is only for 'big items'. Serve her right for making demands even before I said anything. Now she has to wash the clothes using hands!
She napped on the floor yesterday (she naps daily) so she can watch over Hayley who is also napping downstairs. She coughed slightly at night and told me it was because she slept on the floor in the afternoon.
Told me Hayley took 1 hr to finish lunch yesterday but a check with papa confirmed she took less than 30 mins. She lied. Probably trying to sound to me how difficult it is to watch my girl.
Asked me for some notepads. Said she would like to write down the recipes papa taught her so she can go back and open a restaurant.
Went to Hayley's basket (where I store her stuff like powder, lotion, hair bands etc) and asked if I can give her a hair band (while holding one of it). I asked her why she needs it, she said her hair is getting long. I gave her one. My friend told me I should not have given her, if she wants, tell her not to touch anything that belongs to the family, but instead I will buy her one. This will train her NOT TO simply take things from the house. Sigh.. I really need more training to become an efficient employer.

As for other housework I have no complaints. She will wake up at 6am (sleeps at 9.30pm) and get all the sweeping, mopping, wiping, clothes and car washing done. She still needs a lot of training and reminding on cooking and general house cleaning. She will not automatically wipe dirty areas etc unless told to.

The funniest thing is, she told me she is scared to wipe my girl's bum after she has done her business. Oh boy....

I am sure there will be more to come. So stay tuned.......

Next we are going to get CCTV installed all around the house just to be sure!

Maid, got also susah, don't have also susah. How la like that???

Reni the maid

2011-11-22T09:10:00.009+08:00

Reni is my Indon maid, she started with us yesterday. After months of waiting, from Filipino to Cambodian and in the end it was an Indon maid. Will tell you more about the journey of how I ended up with an Indon maid later (long story :-))

Today's post is about Reni. My first impression is "yier... why so black and so plump one". She has very dark skin, like Indian and is very plump. All sorts of questions came through my mind, what if she climb the chair to wipe the fan and the chair could not hold her weight? can she fit into my tiny toilet? will she eat a lot?

Reni is not one of those typical maid which I usually hear a lot about. This is her first time to Malaysia and her first job as a maid. She attends school up to 18 years old (she claimed). She can read and write in Bahasa Indonesia (I gave her a few Bahasa words to read and she managed to read them correctly). She has 6 siblings and she is the eldest. She is separated from her husband and has a 2.5 year old son. She said she is 25. I got all these infor from her, whether they are true or not I cannot verify. When I checked her passport, she is actually 24 so it's ok, she didn't lie too much about her age.

I think she didn't come from a very poor family. She knows how to use rice cooker, iron and said her father owns a handphone. I am nervous when I found out about all these. This means that my maid is pretty smart, don't need me to teach her step by step on how to do the housework or use most of the electrical appliances but it also means that she's pretty exposed and would probably be cunning and cheeky. Sigh... pros and cons.

Anyway, she is supposed to help me with the housework, cook and watch over the kids when I am not around. I am still uncomfortable leaving her with the kids alone for now. Motherly instinct so I am going to trust it. She does things pretty quickly, she woke up at 6am this morning and when I got up at 7.30am she is almost done with the house work; sweep, mop, wipe etc and even wipe clean both the cars. A closer inspection revealed that her work is pretty sloppy, there are still dirt marks on the cars, the toilet is not brush clean properly etc. She is also the type who needs people to constantly remind her to do this and that. Once she is done with what we've asked her, she will sit there and do nothing. She's not the auto type who will go around the house to look for things to wipe/clean. She also does not look like one who adores kids.

On her first day, she even asked me if I would allow her to watch TV if she is done with her work and I am not at home. And today, she asked me if she can go for an hour nap (she's napping now). She dare to ask these when I am home, what would she do if I am not home?

I am also beginning to feel uncomfortable having a stranger around. I hope this feeling would go away after a few days, after I got accustomed to it.

Sigh.. got maid also got issues, no maid also got issues.. how la like that???

Concert & Graduation 2011

2011-11-20T16:40:00.006+08:00

Saturday, 19th November 2011 marks another milestone in Hayley's life. She successfully completed her 1st year in kindie and performed in a mini concert. We've never been more proud of her.

She and all her classmates, the 3 year olds, did a dance to the 'We go Together' song, sang the 'Negaraku' and '1 Malaysia' and teamed up with the 4 year olds to sing the 'It's a Small World' song.

My talkative 3 year old was also given the honour to introduce their class performance where she and another classmate (boy) was given the mic, stood in the middle of the stage (just the 2 of them) and had to say their name, their class and the song they will be dancing to. She was brave and had no stage fright whatsoever, so so proud of her!!

The theme was 'Disney World' and this cheapskate mummy did a DIY Mickey Mouse headband instead (in less than 10 mins :-)).

Ceh ceh's supporters

Putting on ICIs. I actually prefer her to be without makeup (how to remove make up for kids and make them wash their face properly after that???).

The teachers also used some gold dust on their hair, SUPER HATE!!

Still ICI-ing

More supporters

Waiting.....

Teachers and students singing the '1 Malaysia' song. There is something which I just have to mention here. Half way through the song, the little boy in orange (the 1st one in the queue) sat down on the floor trying to fix his broken '1 Malaysia' thingy. When he failed to fix it, he started crying while everyone else was still singing. The teacher quickly gave him a new one and he immediately stopped crying. It was really cute ;). And btw, he was the boy that bit my girl here, NOT CUTE! :(

The super cute 3 year olds doing their dance to the song 'We Go Together'. Look at how my girl was trying to 'fix' her partner...

The 3 and 4 year olds singing 'It's a Small World'

Everyone receive a little gift from Teacher Joanne for all the hardwork.

It was a nice hardcover Barney book :)

Zac's 1st Birthday

2011-11-19T10:41:00.003+08:00

We celebrated Zac's 1 year old with 2 small parties with only close family. The 1st party was a couple of days prior to his actual birthday at Paya Serai, PJ Hilton. We then celebrated his actual day with a cake, just the 4 of us.

The big man

The children's area

The naughty girls

Taken on the morning of his actual birthday

The gift mummy redeemed from Enfamama for ceh ceh

The gift mummy redeemed for the birthday boy

Very engrossed in opening the present

I am finally '1' today :-)

Can I have more chocolate cake please????

Happy 1st birthday Zac. May you grow up to be happy and healthy always!!!!

Peer pressure

2011-11-19T10:23:00.007+08:00

I am feeling the pressure.

Most of my friends have started sending their kids who are about the same age as Hayley to piano classes, ballet classes, music classes, arts classes, swimming lessons and whatever classes you can find out there and they asked me if I have or if I am going to send my girl to any.

My girl is turning 4 in Feb and the pressure is intensifying. One part of me wanted to send her to these classes so she's on par with the other kids her age, spend less time in front of the TV and teaches her about discipline and responsibilities but the other part of me is asking ME a lot of questions. Does she really need these classes at such young age? Why do I want to give in to these peer pressures and get my already hectic weekend even more hectic having to chauffeur her between classes? Will she be less smart, less cool or less intelligent if she is not attending any of these classes? I don't have the answers.

I guess there is no harm in keeping her occupied with something she is keen on rather than have her at home with her eyes glued to the tv all the time. But at 3+, what would suit her? I've tried to observe her to see if she's good at anything specific so I can continue to hone those skills but the only thing she is good at from my observation is 'talking'! She can really talk and makes you shake your head in disbelief all the time!

I asked her a couple of times if she wants to learn piano, she said yes. Then I asked her if she wants to learn dancing and she said yes. I asked her again if she wants swimming, she said she can swim. I asked her again to pick a favourite and she said 'mmm... I want dancing, I want piano, I want swimming'. How la like that?! Oh her teachers did say she love to dance. Of course she love to dance, she's my kid, got my genes la! :-)

So I tried to list down a couple of the most common ones:-

Ballet? Nah, she's too boyish for that. Ballet needs poise and discipline and she's got none of those.
Piano? This is a maybe but definitely not now. We are hoping to bring papa's piano out from hometown and when the piano is here (whenever that will be), then we can consider this.
Arts? She's still too playful for things that requires focus and attention. The teacher mentioned to me during the report card day that she has improved a lot overall but it is still quite tough to get her to finish something that requires concentration and focus. She gets distracted easily as always and you really need to sit next to her and instruct her to finish what she started.
Dancing? Hip hop or breakdance might suit her but what's the benefit? She often dances in front of the TV at home anyway.
Swimming? That's an idea but where can I find swimming schools? Both papa and I can't swim so we need her to know how to swim :-)

What did you all plan out for your kids? What would you recommend for a an active talkative kid like mine? Care to share with me?

Bite marks

2011-11-10T21:09:00.003+08:00

Both kids got bitten today :(

My boy got bitten by mozzies and it usually will end up like these and they will usually last for 3 - 4 days. Now he still doesn't know how to scratch and I don't dare to imagine how many 5 cents or 10 cents marks he will end up having when he does know how to scratch later.

And my girl got bitten by her classmate. This photo was taken at 9pm, about 10 hours after the incident. When the teacher first told me over the phone, I was so angry I wanted to find the boy and pull out all his teeth. But then I calmed down and reminded myself that they are just kids. It could happen the other way around and if that really did happen I am sure I would feel very sorry for the other kid as well.

Popo's 60th Birthday

2011-10-30T10:02:00.003+08:00

October is a month full of birthday celebrations (and money flowing out hahaha). Popo turned 60 on 20th October but because it was a weekday, we celebrated her birthday on 16th October.

As turning 60 seems a big deal for the Chinese (not sure why), we had a big celebration for her at Sin Coi Wah restaurant in Bdr Sri Damansara. Food was great.

The entire family turned up for the party and we all had a great time.

Birthday parties provides a great opportunity for the entire family to meet and catch up.
Seen here the youngest (2 months old) greeting the oldest (84 years old) in the family.

The whole family, needs 6 tables to fit all!

Aunty belting out some songs to keep us entertained

Birthday cake from Lavendar (RM220) and Q Jelly (price unknown).
Jelly cake courtesy of grandma and aunt.

Popo's angels

My angel

The entire family

Popo with her mom and siblings

Zac's Update: 11+ months

2011-10-30T09:51:00.004+08:00

At 11+ months, I:

love to dance to catchy tunes on TV or radio
can pull myself to stand, but still can't walk yet
still not crawling on 4, prefer to crawl on my tummy and help my mummy clean the floor at the same time :-)
drooling a lot lately probably because more teeth are coming out
no longer use the bath tub for showers, I shower from the shower head directly while seated on a stool.
can identify certain objects and move my wrist to the 'twinkle twinkle little star' song
still have the swelling on my left cheek, same old same old

We are going to celebrate my 1st birthday today at Paya Serai with the entire family. On my actual birthday (1st Nov), mummy said we'll probably just get a cake (as she is working on that day) and have another simple celebration at home, just the 4 of us. On 2nd Nov, I will be having my 1 year old jab :(

This only happens when he is dead tired!

Winning a prize

2011-10-16T18:01:00.005+08:00

2 months ago I participated in a contest organised by Alice Law and won :). Thank you Alice!!

This is the prize I won and both my girl and my boy enjoyed playing with it. I really love Fisher-Price toys, they are so colourful, educational and interactive.

Ever since the toy arrived, my girl have been busy 'cooking' stuff for me to eat using her new kitchen and my boy enjoyed the catchy tunes and love dancing to the tunes.

Papa's birthday

2011-10-16T17:39:00.004+08:00

Papa's birthday was just a few days after mine. This time we celebrated it at a karaoke. Hayley's and Zac's first visit to a karaoke :)

On the way...

Look who's having a blast :)

Papa's cake from 'Just Heavenly'

Popo belting out a song

My birthday celebration

2011-10-16T17:23:00.004+08:00

This is rather late but better late than never :). I had a great time on my birthday and here are some photos to share :)

My morning surprise from papa

My birthday cake.. haha. I am 1 every year :)

My pride and joy

Eagerly waiting for me to take out the cake

She ate half the cake

She suddenly took out these 2 dots from under her laptop and placed it on her own face!

My best buddies, we will never fail to meet up on our birthdays

Zac's update: 10+ months

2011-10-01T10:30:00.003+08:00

At 10+ months, I:

have 4 teeth, middle lower and upper incisors are out but the upper incisors are pretty wide apart :(
can recognise and point to certain items, can 'give' things when asked
I can finally move forward by pulling myself using my hands and stand for a short while if assisted
still have the swelling on my left cheek, same old same old
can now fight with jie jie on the things/toys that I want

Went to the doctor for a mild flu and cough and my weight was circa 9.1kg. Mummy got shocked as she thought I would have at least weight 10+kg.. sigh... mummy is now on a feeding frenzy to make me heavier as the ideal weight should be 3X my birth weight when I turn 1 (which is just another month away). But since I am not feeling well, my appetite has been quite poor. Well, we'll just do our best.

Horse Carnival 2011 at Selangor Turf Club

2011-09-26T10:32:00.010+08:00

On Sunday, we took the opportunity (cause my mom was around to babysit Zac) to bring Hayley to the Horse Carnival at Selangor Turf Club, located near the Palace of the Golden Horses Hotel. The carnival was held from 23rd - 25th Sep from 11am to 6pm. See here for more details www.selangorturfclub.com/nhs2011/

Since Hayley is quite an animal lover (sometimes), we thought it would be nice to expose her to a real horse as opposed to seeing horses on TV or in books. The carnival was better than what I expected but I would not suggest bringing babies there as it was quite hot and crowded and nothing much for babies to do there other than looking at horses. And because of the crowd, we had to queue for about 20 mins for the poney ride (RM3 per ride) and also queue for about 10 - 15 mins for the shuttle bus to take us to and from the carnival back to the public parking area (another reason why you should not bring babies and strollers).

The various types on horses and ponies on display

Hayley taking her poney ride. Before the ride (while waiting), she kept telling me she was scared of the horses and said the horses farted at her but the moment we put her on the horse, she was all smiles.

Carriage ride (we didn't queue for this one)

She pat the horse to say 'thank you' after the ride.

A friend said I look so old in this photo :( sigh.. the price to pay for being a working mom!

Making funny faces

The clown asked her 'what do you want little girl?'

She answered 'I want a penguin' [dunno what gave her the idea]

The clown said 'sorry I don't have penguins' and made her a bear instead :)

Seen here with her orange bear

We arrived about 3pm and left at 4.30pm. We'll surely come back if they organise another one in the near future :)

Some latest photos

2011-09-25T10:57:00.011+08:00

Since I don't have much time to write posts, I am taking in Leona's suggestions to post more photos instead. So here are some recent photos (in fact it was taken yesterday) taken at a cousin's wedding:

Kid are ready

My elder sis with my kids and her kids.... This is what I call having your handsful!

This photo also reminded me not to have 4 kids!

When kids are not around... hehehe

Zac and popo

Rare family shot

My kids with my sis and her boyfriend. For some weird reasons, my girl loves Ivan (the boyfriend) to bits... she will say she miss kor kor more than she will say she misses her yi yi

Zac and small yi yi

Aunty June (my cousin's wife) carried Zac during his fullmoon with the hope that she will conceive. And so she did! :-). She will due in Nov (same month as Zac, how cool is that?!)

My big day

2011-09-22T10:23:00.004+08:00

Today is my big day. So what should I do today?

I took off from work. Woke up at the same time in the morning to get the kids ready. Sent the big one to school and then the little one to babysitter. When I got home my 'maid mode' automatically got turned on and I cleaned the house (upstairs and downstairs) including the toilets. So what's next? Birthday is like that one ah? Take leave and turn myself into a maid???? haiz...

But something good did happen this morning. My girl woke up and sang me a birthday song (she said she must sing to me by herself and so she did) and received my 'surprised' birthday gift from papa. I said surprised because usually I pick my own present and he will pay for it but this time he bought it and left it on the table along with a bouquet of flowers! I think this is the first birthday surprise I've received from him since we started dating 10+ years ago hehehehe

OK, I need to leave my computer and enjoy the rest of my 'big day'. Although I am not sure what we're going to do next.... need to think of something to make sure this day is meaningful. Maybe go out for lunch and shop till I drop since kids are not with me. It's something I won't get to do on usual days :)

I also need to make sure I get a birthday cake so my kids can sing to me again tonight and blow the candles with me. I am so looking forward to that :)

OK will be back soon with an update on how my day went....

Sayonara!

Little rascal, little angel

2011-09-07T06:58:00.032+08:00

It has certainly been a while since I blog solely about my girl who is not so little anymore. She is now 3+. How time flies. Since boy was born life has been pretty hectic for us that I have to be selective on what to blog (cause no time ma) and my posts are usually pretty short. A long post will require a lot more effort and time which is something I cannot afford right now :(

Most blogger moms I know are usually very quiet on weekends, I guess so they can spend quality time with family. For me, it was just the opposite. Weekdays are more hectic and routine, hardly got spare time to do anything else unless I sacrifice sleep. The only time I have to blog nowadays would be on weekends when the kids are asleep and when housework are done.

This is a long overdue post of my girl. My 3 year 7 months old has indeed grown a lot since becoming a sister and since she attended school. She really enjoyed going to school. She can now sing some kid songs in Mandarin and Bahasa Melayu and even the national anthem (of course not the entire anthem, just bits and pieces here and there but you can make out the song). She is familiar with all the alphabets (capital and small letters) and numbers 1 to 10. She can count (below 10) pretty well and can do some simple additions using her fingers. Since I didn't spend time nurturing her at home, I am very proud of her achievements and didn't regret sending her to school (except when she picked up the germs and got sick).

My girl is also very sarcastic and witty, probably something she picked up from me (haha). At 3 years old she knew when to bombard back at you when you said the wrong things or did the wrong things. She knew the right words to use to get back at you and made you speechless. Just this morning she came back from her cycling routine with her popo and I told her to put her shoes back properly (she was wearing slippers) and she said this "it's not shoes, it's slippers". Just the other day her papa drove to a dead end and was trying to reverse and she said "papa, what are you doing? why you drive to the wrong place?". Yesterday I asked her if she wants a new papa. She said yes. Then I asked her why? She said "cause papa didn't wear shirt, shame shame, so I don't love him". Then I asked what if he's wearing a shirt? She said "then it's ok, I love him".

I was always told by my sisters and some friends that I have a tough cookie, very 'tai kar ceh' little girl. I always thought she would not get bullied or worst still bullying someone else and boy I was wrong. One day she came home from school and I found her spare clothes in a mess and her panty missing (I always check her bag). I asked her what happened and she said 2 black kor kor (her version of Indian boys) take out her things. At 3 years old some of the things she said are still inconsistent and confusing so I tried my best to make out what happened. I know the teachers will pay attention to the kids in school and the only place where bullying can happen to her will be in her transport home. The driver is a nice man but he's too soft and usually don't really care about the kids (sigh). So I asked her if it happened in the car and she said yes. I asked her if she told Uncle Suhaili (the driver) and she said "Uncle Suhaili ask them not to disturb me but they don't listen". Then I asked the babysitter (she is the only one who gets to meet the driver when he sends Hayley to her home everyday after school) and she then (yes she didn't tell me earlier) said Hayley sometimes will be crying when she picked her up and her school bag is always opened. I was furious and heart broken. How can 2 little kids bully another little kid and they chose MY KID! Then I found out the bullies were twins and they were quite big built. I then confronted the teachers and got them to help speak to the boys and also the driver. The teachers then told me that they also heard similar complaints about the boys from other sources. A few days after speaking to the teachers she came home and told me "mummy, the black kor kor didn't disturb me anymore" :)

Since we're still on the topic about the black kor kor, here is another incident. I always pack snacks for her to bring to school just in case she would be hungry while waiting for the transport home (the school provides snacks). Sometimes I provide biscuits, sometimes egg tarts, sometimes buns depending what I managed to buy the day before. One day I bought her a bun with a small piece of ham in the centre. When I saw her tupperware empty I asked if she had the bun. She said she ate the ham. She adds that it was very nice. I thought she finished the entire bun. The next day the babysitter told me the twins took her bun and she snatched back the ham and she only had the small piece of ham while the boys ate the entire bun. Since then I stopped providing snacks for her because I do not want them to target her because of the food in her bag. I think the boys are at most 5 years old, how scary kids can be nowadays when they are not being watched carefully by their parents.

All the bullying aside, my 3 year old have also started turning into a little lady. I used to struggle with her nail biting habit and guess what solved my problem? A nail polish. My little lady asked for nail polish and showed me her nails. She said this "mummy, see my nails. I didn't bite my nails. They are long and nice and you can put colour for me". How can I say no to that? So the next day I went and bought her a pink nail polish and coloured her nails for her. She was truly happy and have since stopped biting her nails and proudly showing off her shiny nails to everyone :)

My little vainpot also asked for a crown and princess dress and hair clips. I think very soon we are going to go shopping together and she will be choosing my outfits for me :-). Yesterday I wore a spaghetti strap top and she said "mummy, your shirt is so sexy"... hahahaha.

Apart from being vain, my little lady is also very caring. When I had my 2nd gastric attack (the very terrible one where I literally had to curl up like a ball and threw up numerous times for a couple of hours) she walked over to me and asked me if I was OK a couple of times. She handed me tissues to wipe my mouth after I threw up, she pat my back when I threw up and the best of all she used her napkin to cover me and asked if I was cold and she looked worried.

Sometimes we have little siu keongs at home (cockroaches) and when she was younger she used to ask her papa to catch it and kill it. Lately she asked her papa not to kill it, they are my friends, she said.

She is also very helpful when it comes to the little brother. We usually have dinner together (the 3 of us) while we let the little one watch TV to keep him occupied. Sometimes he gets bored and will make noise or cry seeking attention. The sister will go to his rescue and bring him toys to play (and pick up for him when he dropped it) and she will even make silly faces or silly noises to make him laugh. She can be an angel to the little brother when she's not snatching away his toys or pushing him away when his walker ran over her toes :)

Every night before going to bed she will say "mom, I forgot to hug and kiss you la".

Whenever she turned off her angelic mode, she still constantly drives us up the wall ie doing things we specifically ask her not to. One very recent scene is where she poked her papa's new TV with her lantern stick and even when the papa asked her to stop, she will still want to poke it one last time. She also likes to draw on the sofa despite me telling her many times not to. Once she was talking so much in the car I asked if she can stop for 5 mins and I will reward her with a chocolate when we get home. She immediately stopped talking but then tried to communicate with me with her mouth closed but humming sounds and showing hands gestures. She is still very energetic and rough. She likes to run to you and hug you but she will actually run and bang into you to hug you. If you're not standing firmly, you might fall *yes that rough! She also likes to interrupt conversations or get involved in whatever we are doing. She is very nosey and wants to be apart of everything.

At 3 year 2 months old she stopped using diapers at night on her own. Apart from constantly reminding her that she's a big girl now and she needs to go to the toilet on her own at night, we didn't really make any effort to train her or to wake her up at night to go to the toilet. We're all talk but no actions here. She stopped wetting her diapers on her own and was diaperless at night for 3+ months. After those months, she started wetting the bed again out of the blue :(. Now we put her back on diapers again.

Sometimes when I look at my sister's 3 year old who is the apple of everyone's eye at her home because she was the youngest and then I look at my 3 year old who is now a big sister who stopped enjoying the privileges of being the only child or the youngest child gives me mixed feelings. One part of me felt happy that she is more mature, helpful and independent but the other part of me felt pitiful for her. She has to give up her car seat and use a booster seat (less comfortable), she must share her toys with her brother else she gets spanked or scolded, she sometimes gets neglected when we are concentrating on the little boy and the list goes on. Whenever I am in my guilty mode, I sometimes end up buying things for her (it should not be encouraged, I know).

Now that boy is much older and easier for us to bring him out, we also try to get more involved with her school activities as and when possible. On Friday we attended her school's Lantern festival cum Hari Raya cum National Day celebration at the field near the school. Kids were asked to dress up in traditional attire and to bring along their lanterns made in school. For once we managed to attend the party (all 4 of us) and I also bumped into Alice Law and her family. Juan Juan was in baju kurung and she looked so sweet and mature. Both Juan Juan and Ah Xuan were holding really nice and expensive looking lanterns :)

Here is my little lady in her baju kurung and her lanterns:

She experienced her first ferry ride when we went to Penang during the Hari Raya and National Day holiday. She was happy being in the ferry. Penang Island itself was jam packed and the journey back to KL took us 12 long hours. Seen her with her popo:

At the beach with her papa. They both have the same smile :)

Here is another photo of her taken on Saturday (10 Sep) before attending Caitlin's birthday (my neighbour's 10 year old daughter). She wanted to wear her 'party' dress :)

And another snapshot of her when she was engrossed in some cartoons.

Zac's Update: 9+ months

2011-09-02T10:41:00.004+08:00

At 9+ months, I:

have 2.5 teeth, both the middle lower incisors are out and the top left middle incisor is half way out
can wave goodbye and can occasionally do 'high fives' and clap my hands
still can't crawl forward but can stand for a short while if assisted
still love pulling hair and spectacles and pinching/scratching other people's face
still have the swelling on my left cheek
went on my first trip to Penang. It was a long trip due to the bad traffic. I got agitated after sitting in the car seat for a while and wants to be carried. I also love going to the beach to see the jet skis, banana boats, birds, etc

Not sure how much I have gained this month as I have not been weighed since my last visit to the doctors.

Great way to drink Dom

2011-08-14T16:57:00.005+08:00

If you dislike drinking Dom like me but don't know what to do with all the Dom that you would have probably received as gifts after having a baby or two etc, don't fret. Try my suggestion below and I can assure you that you will finish your Dom in no time :)

This method was introduced to me by aunty Foong my confinement lady and I used to have it every alternate night during my confinement.

Mix half a bowl of Dom with slightly more than half a bowl of water and put it in the slow cooker for 4 hours. It is that simple. You can also add a hard boiled egg (peel the skin and put it in) into the mixture and let everything boil together. The egg will taste very smooth and soft. Aunty Foong said it is very healthy and beneficial to the body too.

I love it, not sure about you. Try it out and let me know what you think :)

Traditional chinese medicine

2011-08-07T15:07:00.018+08:00

Because of the marathon in the last 2 months and because I am sick and tired of feeding the kids antibiotics, cough and cold syrup and paracetamol, I have started to look to the east. Now that they are well, I want to boost their health with some traditional chinese medicine so they won't fall sick so easily and won't need to rely on western medicine so much. Most importantly the chinese medicine will not make them lethargic, tired, have cold hands and feet and most importantly there is almost no risk to allergies (not suitable for babies with G6PD though). My sister recommended me a chinese doctor in Klang, her kids are regulars there.

The doctor prescribed some herbs for Zac and Hayley. The herbs are blended into powdery form so it would be easy to feed (just dilute in water). I also got some prescription for papa and me, ours are in the form of herbs, roots and leaves. The medicine is very bitter, very tough to get Hayley to consume them but Zac seems to be able to tolerate it much better. And because Zac is not even 1, I reduced the quantity. The doctor prescribed 1 tea spoon of powder but instead I only gave him half.

The goodies for papa and me

Apart from traditional chinese medicine, I am also giving them:

1. Cordyceps
These little worms cost me a bomb. My next door neighbour and the salesman at EYS said they are very good for lungs and should be taken after a bad cough/during a bad cough to heal the damaged lungs. Cordyceps enhances immunity, therefore building resistance against coughs and colds. It reduces phlegm, strengthens the lungs and fortifies the kidneys. It is also very good for health. Another friend also said it is recommended to improve appetite. It sounds like the perfect solution for my kid's cough and cold and Hayley's poor appetite. I boil it with birds nest and rock sugar (1 piece of birds nest with 3 Cordyceps) and will give the kids once every 2 or 3 weeks. Hayley will get half a bowl and Zac just a few small sips. The chinese doctor is against me giving Zac Cordyceps (she said not to give when they are too young) but I think it is ok to give in small controlled quantity. Plus I am only giving once every 2 or 3 weeks.

We've so far had this once and since then Hayley's appetite improved tremendously. She's less picky and more willing to try out new stuff and she's eating much faster and in bigger quantity too. I don't know if it's mere coincidence or if it's really the results of Cordyceps. Don't really care :-)
2. Pearl powder
I usually keep stock a few of these at home and use when necessary. I was introduced to pearl powder by the babysitter and also my sister. My family members are very prone to throat infection (meaning our body gets heaty very easily which leads to throat infection and then fever) so we usually take pearl powder to reduce the heat as and when we feel it coming. Apart from cleaning excess heat, pearl powder is also used to calm the nerves and improves eyesight and complexion. Everytime I noticed the kid's lips turning red or their body feeling a bit warm, I will give them some of these powder, I usually mix into their milk. Haylet gets a bottle and Zac half a bottle. In the past I used to just get them from normal chinese medicine shop but Alice made me realise that I could be feeding my kids some unknown powder if I am buying it from unreliable sources. Since then I get them from EYS. I didn't know EYS actually sell them until recently. 6 bottles costs RM108 and member gets 5% discount and because of promotion, they are giving an additional 5%.
3. Bo Ying Compound
I was introduced to Bo Ying Compound by Leona. Again this is from EYS. I went to EYS to enquire and the salesman told me it is a good product to give to kids to maintain their health. Bo Ying Compound alleviates fever and cold, eliminates phlegm, calms nerves, removes wind in the body, increases blood circulation, promotes health, detoxification and anti-inflammation. It can be given everyday but I prefer to give just once a week. Hayley can take 1 bottle and Zac half a bottle. I don't usually give it to the kids weekly but will give from time to time. Although I know chinese medicine will do no harm but I still prefer to give in moderation and as and when necessary.4. Manuka honey
I haven't got this yet but this is something I would like to get next. They have it at EYS and also at GNC. EYS is a bit pricier than GNC. Manuka honey is also a good supplement to boost overall health and some of my friends told me their kids does not cough as much after consuming Manuka honey. It is also a valuable aid for the healing of burns, infected wounds and ulcers, and assists in treating dyspepsia, stomach ulcers and other digestive disorders. It can help relieve skin conditions such as eczema, psoriasis, dermatitis and acne. Manuka Honey also soothes sore throats and helps to speed up recovery from colds and flu. Manuka honey is to be given daily, 1 teaspoon once a day. Unfortunately, it is not suitable for Zac as he is still under 1 year old.

Honestly, a combination of all the above do cost me a bomb but if it will help my kids get stronger naturally and fall sick less often (hence saving on medical bills and trips to clinics), I think it is all worth it. I don't mind cutting up some of my personal expenses (not that I spend a lot) to cater for these.

I'll see if a combination of the above actually works better than multivitamins, vitamin C, fish oil and yogurts which I use to give to Hayley on a daily basis. Despite her taking these supplements religiously, I didn't really see an overall improvement in her health. Plus these supplements are not cheap too. Some even said multivitamins are actually very heaty and if the kids does not consume enough water, they will end up getting sick!

Zac's Update: 8+ months

2011-08-01T09:07:00.010+08:00

At 8+ months, I:

still can't crawl forward but can reverse, love to stand but can only do so if assisted for a short while

love pulling hair and spectacles and pinching other people's face

am much more adventurous with food, love bread, porridge and rusks

sleep through the night from 9/10pm till 7/8am

have 2 teeth, lower middle incisors. The one on the left is half way out whereas the one on the right is just coming out

have my first fever due to throat infection, fever reached 39.7c and it lasted 3 days

still have the swelling on my left cheek

have double eye lid on my left eye but none on my right, the dimple is also on my left cheek but not my right, the swelling is also on my left cheek, why is everything on the left???

enjoy watching cartoons and love to play

love remote controls, the real ones, not the fake ones

love putting everything into my mouth - fingers, toys, books, pens, labels from pillow cases, remote controls etc

this month I have been to many doctors - child specialists, GP, radiologist and even child surgeon

My weight is still circa 8.5kg. I didn't gain much probably due to me being sick for a while and didn't have much appetite to eat. I went for another hair cut this week as well.

Concentrating watching cartoons

Lets get sick together marathon

2011-07-24T18:51:00.005+08:00

I have to say that the last 2 months must have been the toughest for us since Zac was born. The entire family signed up for a marathon, the lets get sick together marathon! :(

It all started 2 months ago when Hayley brought back the cough and cold bug. She had cough, runny nose and throat infection and was having fever as high as 39.6 over a couple of days which warranted an emergency visit to the 24 hours clinic nearby home one night. Her fever was consistently high especially in the middle of the night so we're constantly up sponging her and checking her temperature. She had no appetite and it was difficult to force food/medicine down her throat. She was basically on fluid for the 5 days.

This time she also passed on the bug to Zac. This was Zac's first time getting unwell since he was born. Zac also had the cough and runny nose. Although Zac didn't get the fever (thank God), his cough were horrible. He's got so much phlegm you could literally hear him wheezing when he breathes. Because the cough was so bad he didn't really get much sleep at night as he was constantly coughing. The child specialist said the phlegm were in his lungs and it would take a while for it to clear. She prescribed antibiotics as well so both my kids were heavily on drugs and antibiotics.

After about a week they were both getting better. Hayley's cough was improving and although Zac was still wheezing slightly, it didn't really disturb him as much. And then it was my turn. I too ended up with throat infection and fever and was out of order for about 3 days. I too had to rely on antibiotics.

As I was on the road to recovery, it was papa's turn. He's got the symptoms and suffered the same fate. Papa's condition was pretty bad. The first antibiotic prescribed by the doctor didn't work and he was still feverish on the 5th day (doctor suggested the dengue test). He went back and asked for a stronger one. Luckily the 2nd one worked.

I thought the nightmare was over when everyone was getting much better and then it started all over again. Sigh......

Hayley's cough and runny nose came back and because Zac have not recovered fully, he contracted it again as well. This time he ended up with the throat infection and his fever soared to 39.7 and his face was all red and shiny and scared the shit out of me. We gave him suppository and it only worked after about an hour! Doctor prescribed with him antibiotics again. He had fever for 3 days and requires lots of sponging and monitoring at night. The strange thing that we found out during his fever bout is that the side with the swelling is hotter than the other side. When we took his ear temperature, the right ear reads 38.5 and the left ear would read 39!

As for me, I got gastritis for the first time and was in pain the entire Sunday despite being on medication. Papa strangely was also feeling unwell on the same Sunday, fever and headache so can you imagine 2 sick adults watching over 2 sick kids?! It was really tough and time passed so slowly. The entire family was sleeping a lot on that Sunday.

It's been a week since the marathon and we're still recovering. Hayley's cough is gone but she's still sniffing slightly. Zac's cough is almost gone but his nose is still runny. Papa's fever is gone but occasionally still gets the headache. I am still on medication for my gastritis and is no longer in pain.

June and July was really tough on us. If I am not mistaken, I think the number of visits to child specialists and clinics in just that 2 months was somewhere between 10 - 15 times. Imagine that!

The Monster in him

2011-07-22T14:37:00.008+08:00

I cried so hard my eyes were swollen. After a big cry and a few calls (to my mom and my sis) to get it out of my system I was feeling so much better.

This morning I took Zac to see Dr Lee. Dr Lee gave him a thorough check and had a good look at the swelling. He said Zac is a very healthy boy with a very good weight. As for the swelling he didn't really comment much, he probably was puzzled too like all the other doctors. He did however say that since it didn't seem to bother him and it is not painful, we should just leave it and monitor it for a while. He adds that he has seen a lot of cases like these where some will go away after a while, some gets bigger and some becomes permanent. He did however add that Zac could probably have been born with it and it grew overtime without us realising. He said a child surgeon would probably be able to tell us the diagnostic and options better and suggest that we see a Dr Goon who is in a clinic next to his.

Since we were already there I wanted to meet with Dr Goon if he is available. Thankfuly he is. After waiting for a few mins, we went in to meet with the surgeon. Our hearts pounding. Dr Goon inspected the swelling and the ultrasound and the first thing he said was 'there is water inside here' referring to the swelling. Then he went on to explain about the complications of the area and what are our alternatives. He used a lot of medical terms and chinese words and we tried to understand as much as we can. The discussion went on for about 15 mins. So whatever I am writing here is based on layman terms, ie terms that I can understand and they are not exactly the terms/words he used.

Dr Goon said what's inside are fluid but whether it is blood or some clearer liquid (he said something about 'lymph' something which I could not remember) is something we cannot determine. He said the swelling is located right at the lymph nodes which is just next to the ear and he is also unable to determine if it is in the lymph nodes itself or if it is next to it or if they are actually connected/touching. I asked him if we could do some other scans to determine what it is exactly and he said even a CT Scan will not be able to give him an answer as they are really close.

The lymph nodes is where the main vein is controlling the facial movement and it is very dangerous to operate anywhere near there as the chances of it being affected during surgery is usually very high. If the main vein gets affected, he will end up with facial deformities, unable to control his eyes/nose/mouth are some of the effects. He went on and listed out for us the possibilities:

Worst case scenario

He said some will continue growing until it begin to affect the child. Some child's face will tilt to one side to accomodate the growth or the lumps will begin causing issues to the nodes and veins. In cases like these we will need to discuss again and determine the suitable course of action. Surgery might be an option but not without the risks. Even with a surgery, we might also need to consider whether to extract the whole thing or have it partially removed. 'Septated' in the earlier report by the radiologist means that it is a clutter, not just one :-(

Middle case scenario

Dr Goon went on and said that some might just grow to a certain size and then stopped growing. In cases like these we might decide to just leave the lump as it is as it is not life threatening but it means he will have to live the rest of his life with an ugly lump on one side of his cheek. For cases like these we can also consider (if the child is older) to extract the fluid out using a syringe and get it tested to confirm what it is. The test results might also help us to decide what's next ie whether to leave it alone or figure out if it's safe to be surgically removed.

Happily ever after scenario

There are also chances that the lump will decide to go away on its own just like how it magically appeared over a period of time. How long no one knows. It might take days, months or even years.

So what's next?

We will need to continue to monitor the swelling for any growth. Dr Goon did say that it is common for the swelling to subside for a day or 2 and then return bigger for a few days etc. So we should not be alarmed if there are sudden changes in a few days. We should monitor it closely over a longer period and if it constantly gets bigger over a few days, then we need to bring him back for a check up.

We also need to monitor for fever or redness in the swollen area. As the lumps are made of fluid, Dr Goon said he might get infections. When that happens he will need to take antibiotics to control the infection.

We will need to return for a follow up in 6 months.

It really broke my heart to think and imagine what he 'might' need to go through in the near future. Although things are still uncertain for now, like most mothers, I will not stop worrying and blamimg myself for whatever will happen to my child. If given a choice, I would like to take his place and go through whatever he is going through. If given a choice, I would take the lumps and put it in my cheeks. If given a choice, I would ask God to please spare him and let him grow up healthy and normal.

Unfortunately the choice is not in my hands. All I can do now is hope and pray that the lumps will go away on its own very very soon. In the meantime, I will never stop kissing and hugging and loving him and of course his sister too!

The monetary damage today is RM205.

His first ultrasound

2011-07-20T17:25:00.006+08:00

Referred by the child specialist, we took Zac for an ultrasound and he was extremely co-operative. No crying, no whining, my brave boy.

The radiologist at SDMC scanned his swollen cheek (as well as the other side to compare) and wrote this in her report "The left parotid gland is grossly swollen and heterogeneous. It is generally hypodense and appears septated. No obvious upper cervical nodes seen".

I can't really digest what she's trying to say medically but I do know that 'grossly swollen' means I should probably be worried. She concluded her report by saying "This may be post-inflammatory".

So I asked her if this is dangerous and what's next? She said she doesn't really know as she's not a child specialist and suggest that I revisit the child specialist and show her the imaging report and the ultrasound printout and seek further recommendations. I suspect the child specialist will refer me to a ENT specialist. I will need to find time to pay the child specialist another visit soon.

Anyway, the monetary damage at SDMC is RM97.80.

I just hope this is nothing serious and it will go away on its own VERY VERY soon.

Updates:
Spoke to the child specialist Dr Chia who referred us for the ultrasound and told her about the imaging report. She said "no nodes seen" is a good sign but she is still puzzled as to why the swelling and what causes it. She said since it is not pus, not painful and doesn't seem to bother him, it is probably not dangerous and we should wait 2 more weeks to see if it will go away. If it's still there and still the same size by then, she suggests that we consult a surgeon and see if it should be removed surgically. There is no medication to treat it.

Anyway, I am going to get a second opinion from Dr Lee Eng Lam, SDMC since 2 of my friends recommended him [read comments to this post]. Hopefully he will be able to solve this mystery. Maybe I should also see Dr Choy, SDMC who is Zac's paed since he was born for a 3rd opinion? Anyway, I'll decide after meeting with Dr Lee.

The swelling looks more obvious in this photo

My boy and his swollen face

2011-07-18T08:53:00.005+08:00

For the past few weeks my boy had this swell on his left cheek just next to his ear and no it is not mumps. I have got 2 doctors (a child specialist and a normal GP) to check on it and both does not seem to worry. Their opinion:

he didn't have fever so there is no need to worry

the swell is not tender and not red so it's not an infection

it doesn't hurt when we touch or press it

He's got a bad case of cough, flu and phlegm in the last few weeks which might have cause some lymph nodes on his cheeks to swell (you know just like how our throat would sometimes swell if we have sore throat?!, yes like that)

They did however ask me to monitor for growth. Over the past few weeks (I think almost a month), it remained the same and this morning it does seem to look a little bit smaller - or maybe it was just psychological. Anyway, I have decided that if the swelling is still around this Friday, I am going to bring him back to his paediatrician at SDMC for a scan just to be sure.

See it for yourself and tell me if you'll be worried:

Hayley's 1st Report Card Day

2011-06-27T16:38:00.012+08:00

We've had our first official meet the teachers day to discuss about Hayley's progress in school on 19th June at 9.30am. I have to say that papa and mummy were by far more anxious and excited than the 'star' of the day. We've preparing ourselves for words such as 'she's so active', 'she cannot sit still', 'she gets distracted easily' or worst 'can you please not send her to school anymore' hahahaha from the teachers.

Waiting for her turn to meet the teacher

This is her passport photo.. Look at how much she has grown!

Overall her results were pretty good. Lots of As with a few Bs on areas that I am sure we can work on. The meeting was short and the teacher didn't have much to say about her, no news is always good news :-). The principal even told us that she has 'settled down' a lot compared to when she first started. She can now sit in a group and learn in a group environment, something she cannot do when she first joined as she gets distracted very easily. The teacher and principal also adds that she's a very affectionate child, likes to hug the teachers and carer and is very bonded with them.

I also took the opportunity to provide my 2 cents to the teachers:

I reminded the teachers that they should be careful with the words they used around the kids. My girl came back from school one day saying 'busy body' and when I asked her who used the word she told me teacher said she was busy body. Well this is not a bad word but I think the teachers sometimes will also need to be reminded to be more careful with their selection of words.

I always wonder how the kids can/will line up and use the toilet before their snack time. My girl was in the bathroom one day and told me she wanted to pee standing (demonstrating to me like how a boy would pee). I ask her why she wants to pee like that. She told me teacher said she can pee like that. I know the teachers won't say she can pee like that but I am just wondering how she knows that boys will pee like that if she's not exposed to it in school????

Recently I've also been making her practise her writing as and when I can. I have to say that it is not easy to make her sit down and write as she does get distracted very easily. Here's her first attempt at writing her own name without me holding her hand or showing her the alphabets. She wrote this on her own with no help from me. This was her best attempt so far and deserved a star :-)Unfortunately, a few days later, she could still write her name but the alphabets were in different sizes, the spaces between the alphabets were different, the alphabets written in the wrong way ie from the right to the left etc... it was really messy! :-(

I really need to make her practise everyday to keep the momentum going. I wish I have more time especially on weekdays. If I could just dedicate 30 mins with her each day to practise writing, colouring or even some arts and crafts with her, I am sure she it will help her focus and concentrate better in school.

Zac's Update: 7+ months

2011-06-24T17:13:00.012+08:00

At 7+ months, I:

am not very adventurous with food, I still prefer milk

can sit unassisted for a short time and will often topple sideways when I lose my balance

still can't crawl but can roll from one end of the bed to the other easily

am getting better at my motor skills, can hold a toy, change hands and turn it to whichever way I want it to be

like jumping up and down and I like knocking on things to make music

still get 1 feed in the middle of the night (between my last feed at 9pm and 7am) but for almost the whole of last week and this week, I slept through with no feed!

love playing with my ceh ceh, I would laugh like crazy just looking at her running around. I also love to chase ceh cech on my walker

will show my temper when someone snatch away my toy or when I am not getting what I want

had flu and it lasted quite a while (on and off for about 3 weeks) and visited the paed for some medicine, the flu went away but I ended up with swollen tonsils, a very nasty cough and lots of phlegm in my lungs (you can even hear it when I breathe). One side of my cheek got swollen too. The paed said it was because of the infection which causes the swelling of some lymph nodes on my cheeks. As long as it is not red and I have no fever, mummy will only need to monitor for enlargement. I had to be on antibiotics for the first time :-(. Hopefully I will get well soon.

think I am teething. My gums are swollen.

am still as happy as I always will be even when I am sick :-)

While at the doctor we took the opportunity to check my growth. I now weight 8.55kg and am 67cm tall. Mummy and papa said I'm a shorty, like them :-)

My favourite pastime apart from watching 'Your Baby Can Read' CD is scratching my head.

A child's character

2011-06-19T08:10:00.004+08:00

I always wonder, is a child born with a certain character or is it the parent's fault for not educating and guiding the child causing such a character?

My 3 year old is very different from most kids her age from what I can observe. She is very friendly, caring, inquisitive, curious, mature and has a mind of her own.

Although she is very friendly and caring, most kids at the playground dislike to play with her. You may wonder why????

Well, I would like to think that her friendliness and caring nature kind of scare people away and some even find her annoying. For eg. if she see a little kid (one that is younger than her) at the playground, her sisterly instinct would kick in and she would want to protect the kid. She would want to hold his hand, make sure he won't fall and if he failed to rock on the horsey, she would push him, the same for the slide! Now some of you may think, hey there is nothing wrong with that! Well... she is clumsy and rough, she would sometimes unintentionally cause the kid to fall and when she pushes him on the horsey, she would sometimes push too hard and scare the kid. There is no need to mention how she would scare the parents if she try to help to push a kid down the slide! Some parents will find her annoying too cause she just won't stop following their kid!

When she see older kids at the playground, she would want to play with them. She would play whatever they are playing and try to be involved. She just wants to be apart of them and have some friends. Some of these older kids will find her disturbing. Once, one of the older kids even commented 'wo tau yen tar' (mandarin for 'I hate her'). Sigh.. my poor girl.

If she's at the swing and they are all occupied, she would not hesitate to speak her mind and say 'you have to share, its my turn' to any of the kids on the swing. Although I encourage her to speak her mind and although she is not wrong, some parents and kids will find her to be impolite. Most kids her age would just stand at the corner displaying a sad face waiting for their turn but mine as you can see, will not!

Like most kids her age, she also likes to play with what others are playing. If no one is playing with the blocks, she won't touch the blocks. If a kid plays with the blocks, she too wants to play with the blocks. Same will happen to the brother. Whatever the brother is playing, she wants to play. Is that her being possessive or she's just having trouble sharing??

I always encourage her to be loving, not afraid to kiss and hug and express her love. I always remind her to share which is the hardest lesson to teach as she was quite selfish, I would like to blame this as a result of her being the only child for almost 3 years. We don't pamper and spoil her if that's what you're thinking :-). She does get punished and caned whenever necessary.

So how did she end up with this character? Papa always say she is behaving just like me. Is she mirroring what I am doing or did she get my genes and born with it?

And my next question is, is this character good or bad for her?

Now that she's still young she doesn't know and probably not bruised by being brushed aside by other kids. When she is older, how will she react? Will she grow to be someone with a strong character as a result of this or will she get bruised and eventually hide in a corner?

Only time will tell. I will not stop encouraging her to continue to be caring, friendly and inquisitive but I will certainly keep a close eye to make sure it won't end up in a negative way.

Now now, I also want to give credit when credit is due. Her character sometimes do result in many positive remarks from other parents. Sometimes some will say 'she's very sweet and loving' when she 'took care' of their little ones and some even say 'she's so nice' when she hugged the other kids goodbye :-)

Hayley's chatter

2011-06-13T06:51:00.008+08:00

At McDonalds,

Me: How many fries do you want to eat?
Hayley: 5 (showing 5 fingers)
Me: ok I will give you 5

When the fries arrived she immediately took 1. While she was still munching, I gave her 4 more. She started counting..1,2,3,4 then she stared at me

Hayley: how come 4 only?
Me: you said you wanted 5, I gave you 5 (counting the 4 fries plus the one she was holding).
Hayley: not enough, I need more!

Proceeded to snatch the fries from my table.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I was reading a home design magazine before bed one night,

Me: see this house is so nice (making a sad face), I don't have enough money to buy this house.
Hayley: don't be sad, I will buy for you. How many do you want?
Me: I want 2, I want big house
Hayley: (pointing to the houses on the magazine) OK I buy this one and this one for you ok? (then she patted my shoulder and giving me a reassuring look)
Me: you don't have money. The house is very expensive, need a lot of money
Hayley: I got, I got a lot downstairs (referring to her coin box). I give you a lot ok. I take some more (referring to getting more coins from the father) and give you everything...then you can buy this one and this one ok?
Me: OK
Hayley: see this one got swimming pool, you can go swimming also....
Me: (big smile)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

One night during bedtime, while she was lying in bed

Hayley: (out of a sudden) I am so happy. I am a happy girl.
Me: why are you so happy?
Hayley: because i have mummy, daddy, Jun Jun (referring to Zac), yi yi (referrring to my sis), gor gor (referring to my sis's boy friend) and por por.

She made me happy too!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

She wanted her papa to bath her and the papa was in his study,

Hayley: papa, let's go
Papa: give me 5 mins
Hayley: no, 4 mins! then started counting, 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10... ok 4 mins already, let's go..
Papa: *speechless*

These moments made all the tiring days of looking after them worth every sweat!

Mild HFMD?

2011-06-05T00:15:00.004+08:00

As most of you would know that my girl contracted HFMD and we found out on Saturday 28th May when she complained of mouth pain and refused dinner. There were no early warning as she didn't get any sort of blisters/rash on the hands or feet or buttock or even fever. It started with only ulcers in the mouth.

We took her to the doctor on Sunday morning and the doctor said HFMD usually will have blisters/rashes and told us that although there were none, she very likely contracted HFMD as there were quite a number of ulcers in the mouth (tongue, sides of the cheek and even the top). She sent us home with some painkiller and oral gel.

I've heard a lot of scary stories about how kids will refuse food, milk or even water because of the pain. My sister's 3 year old had it few months back and it was terrible. My sister had to force the 'watermelon frost' into her mouth to numb the pain so she could eat/drink something. I panicked. My girl is known to be very picky with food (very 'siu ceh' and 'yim chim') and I was worried on how to get food into her mouth if she's going to be in such pain.

Thankfully it was pretty smooth for us. On Sunday itself I got her to gargle with salt water a few times a day and the ulcers were bearable as she could still eat and drink and even brushes her teeth. She complained of pain from time to time but she still managed to eat (mainly porridge) and finished up her milk. She continued the salt water routine for the following few days.

Apart from the pain caused by the ulcers she was fine. She was quite her normal self. However, we still tried to keep her away from her brother as much as we can. We sent the boy to the babysitter after confirming that he was fine during daytime. I also did a lot of cleaning, disinfecting and wiping at home. The home smelt like Dettol all the time :-)

After being confined at home for 4 days, we sent her back to the babysitter on Wed so I could go back to work. On Thurs I found out that the other baby (Jovin who is 10 months old) at the babysitter contracted the same thing. She didn't have blisters/rashes as well but only ulcers in the mouth. Could she have contracted it from Hayley? If she did then I would feel really bad. But then why didn't my boy get it? He spent more time with Hayley than Jovin did. Anyway, Jovin also got better after a few days. I am starting to feel that this isn't really HFMD, it may be a new type of disease or a mutated one that is going around town. Apparently the doctor Jovin visited told her mom that he has seen 3 kids with the same symptoms just on that morning itself. So parents out there beware!

The next thing which I will need to do would be to change her toothbrush, cups, teats, drinking bottle etc to get rid of the germs once and for all...

KIASUMOM is taking a break because.....

2011-05-29T00:05:00.004+08:00

my daughter got HFMD!!!!!!!!!!!!

Sigh Sigh Sigh.... I am praying very very hard that my boy will be spared but I am not hopeful. In the last few days they were playing so closely together, hugging and kissing.... oh GOD!!!!! Why do kids always have to get this from school??????

Please please give me the strength to get through this. Work is at its peak right now and it is really a bad time to take leave but I guess I have no choice. Where to send my kids if I don't stay home? The babysitter is caring for another baby so I am sure she will not like the idea of me sending my boy over (so I can separate them) since he may already been infected.

God is really putting me to the maximum test right now. I was sick last Wed and just got better and now I have to care for a sick child and a baby.

OK, have to go.. time to get some rest as I will have a lot of cleaning, disinfecting, washing and wiping to do in the next few days ... :-(

Zac's Update: 6+ months

2011-05-28T08:02:00.006+08:00

AT 6+ months, I:

am an expert in my walker, I can go where ever I want and my favourite hang out is the remote control area, there are 4 yummy remotes for me to taste!
am learning to show my emotions, I will wail loudly when someone took away my toy while I am playing with it, I have also developed preference for certain toys
get excited when I see my parents in the evening when they came to pick me up
sometimes wants to be carried and will wave my hands to get attention so someone will carry me
am still taking 6 bottles of 6oz everyday, have recently been introduced to formula (Mamex Gold). I get formula when mummy's supply is running low for that day
have been given other food stuff to try out as well such as potatoes, bananas and teething biscuits, didn't really like them. Prefer to use my teething biscuit as my drum stick... to make music :-)
love going shopping, love seeing so many people and all the exciting things out there
have a nickname, mummy call me 'milo tin' sometimes cause I am round and short, like the tin!
sleep longer at night now only waking up for 1 feed in the middle of the night
ceh ceh recently got HFMD and we've been hugging and kissing a lot. I don't know if I have been infected by her. Let's hope not...

My very first flower from my girl

2011-05-28T07:54:00.003+08:00

Some weeks back when I picked Hayley up from the babysitter she couldn't wait to pass something to me. She couldn't even wait until we get into the car. Right the door step of the babysitter's house, she opened her school bag and took out this:

Hayley: it's for you
Me: what is this?
Hayley: it's a flower, teacher made this
Me: what is it for?
Hayley: Happy Mother's Day

Then I reached for the flower and before I could even touch it she said

Hayley: wait, you have to say Gong Xi Fa Cai to me first (with her hands together doing the Gong Xi Fa Cai gesture)
Me: ah?????? [scratch head]

She got mixed up!!!!!! hahahahaha

Nevertheless, I still appreciate the flower and thank you my dear for a memorable Mother's Day!

Introducing formula

2011-05-24T06:49:00.005+08:00

For the very first time this morning we introduced formula (Mamex Gold) to Zac and thankfully he accepted it with no issues. Zac at 6 months and 3 weeks old still drinks 6 bottles of 6oz everyday and gets 1 or 2 solid meals (rice cereals) a day. My production of breast milk is getting low of late (not sure why, maybe because I was unwell or maybe because of work stress) so I have started using my reserves in the freezer to meet his demands. I initially wanted to wait a while but then decided in the end to introduce him to formula earlier just to be sure that he will be able to tolerate it and not wait until the last min (ie when I ran out of breast milk).

I just find it very weird how my body reacted the same for both my kids. Both kids were exclusively breastfed for 6+ months and then I just stopped producing as much I was able to produce before despite me eating and drinking and expressing the same. I remembered that I also started supplementing Hayley with formula when she was 6+ months. My sis said it was psychological cause I used to tell her that I will be happy if I can exclusively feed my kids for 6 months at least, or maybe it was natural that my body can only cope for so long, I don't know, maybe it was both.

Anyway, I hope I will be able to continue to feed Zac for a little while more, maybe until he reaches 8 months old. I have to say that I did save a lot in the last 6+ months :-)

Life is so fragile

2011-05-18T10:34:00.002+08:00

I just lost a school mate over the weekend to cancer... she was only 35!

When she found out about her cancer slightly more than a year ago, she was already at late stage 3 towards stage 4. In simple words, there was no hope for a cure. Nevertheless she still fought the battle and lost.

It made me realise 'again' that how fragile life can be and how we often take things for granted that 'there will always be tomorrow'. How can we be sure that there will always be tomorrow??

So this serves as a reminder to me and hopefully to the people I care about that life is too short to be wasted. Do what you like to do, eat what you want to eat, say what you want to say (responsibly of course) TODAY as tomorrow might not come....

My 3 year old

2011-05-10T07:02:00.005+08:00

Lately I've been so occupied with Zac and adapting to his 'changed patterns' that I have forgotten to keep a tab on my 3 year old.. sigh.. bad mom I know :-(

Ever since she became a big sister and ever since she attended school, she has changed quite a bit. Just for the records, here they are:

very loving of the little brother although sometimes she still shows some form of jealousy towards him
very helpful when it comes to the little brother ie taking a diaper, picking up his toys from the floor, rocking him when we're busy, pulling his walker away from the TV when he gets too close and the cutest of all is when he is cranky she will go towards him and try to soothe him by imitating what we adults would do
she is able to recite 1 to 20, 1 to 15 on her own and 16 to 20 with some help. She can also count/add smaller numbers such as 1 to 5 correctly on her own and 6 to 10 with some help. If there are 3 of us wearing jeans in the house, she will be able to tell us there are '3 people wearing jeans' or 'there are 4 people in the car' or '3 birds in the sky' etc.
she can recite her A to Z correctly and can recognise her A to Z or a to z with some help on 'g', 'y' and 'u' occasionally.
everyday she likes to sing nursery rhymes and makes the sounds of alphabets such as ba ba, da da, keh keh etc.
she also picked up some malay words from school such as ikan fish, baju shirt, etc and can sing the entire 'bangun pagi gosok gigi song' with actions
picking up the nail biting and straw biting habit from school again, we catches her doing it occasionally
very lovely to get little handicrafts done by her (I am sure 90% completed by the teacher :-)) for special occasions such as angpow lanterns for CNY, a paper flower for Mother's Day etc. She's also very proud and protective with the things she brought home.
been very keen in reading books at night before bedtime (something she didn't like when she was younger). Now she likes to spell the words out and then read them. She doesn't really know how to read yet, she actually memorised them.
have started learning the trade of negotiating with us ie if she wanted to go somewhere she will make a promise that we will only go for 5 mins or just one time etc.
still wearing diapers to bed at night. We've not trained her to go diaperless (our fault) but for the past few nights the diapers has been dry. Then one day we decided to take out the diaper and on that very night she wet the bed. The next night we put on a diaper for her and it was dry :-(
still very picky with food but seems to be more open towards fruits
have also picked up the skill of teasing us. Sometimes she likes to intentionally say the wrong words when we asked her and then followed by a cheeky smile.
is getting better at her colouring or drawing, just need to teach her to be more focused. She gets bored very quickly.

My girl is growing up so quickly that I think I am going to miss the little her ....

Zac's Update: 5+ months

2011-04-26T11:46:00.007+08:00

At 5+ months, I:

prefer to be on my tummy whenever I can, even after milk, which usually end up with me puking on the mattress or the sofa or wherever
am afraid of strangers, will cry when they approach me
can recognise my name
experienced my first fall (ended up with a bruise on the face and forehead) thanks to my mummy
have started solid (some organic rice cereal that mummy bought), sometimes I like it, sometimes I don't
am officially off booties/socks except at night
still love to suck my thumb and fingers or whatever I can grab hold of
enjoy sitting in the walker and can go on reverse only for now
love watching 'Your Baby Can Read' cds
still do not have a proper sleeping routine. I sleep whenever I feel like it. Sometimes I don't want to sleep at night, I want to play!
love when my sister plays with me and will get all excited with whatever toys given to me
still experience different night feeding patterns. For 1 week I was a vampire, waking up every 3 - 4 hrs for feeds. At another week (current week) I slept from 9pm till 6/7am in the morning with no feeds. I am just so unpredictable hehehe

I will need another haircut very soon. I will not be going for any jab until I turn 1 so I don't really know how much I have grown in terms of weight and height. But mummy said she is getting back aches carrying or lifting me so I believe I am doing ok :-)

My sister loves to play 'dress me up' with me

A week of torture

2011-04-26T06:55:00.005+08:00

The past week have been a nightmare... Zac decided that he somehow got bored of his routine and wanted to 'try' something new.. lol...

For the entire week he refused to sleep at night. He would sleep from 9pm till 12/1am and then will demand for milk. After milk he refused to go back to sleep and wanted to play or watch TV. He would then nap for an hour (after he got bored) and then fuss until given milk around 3/4am. Thereafter it would be PLAY TIME all the way! Papa and I were zombified - sleep standing will not be an issue!

He would make so much noise that he would wake the entire household aka ME! Luckily he didn't wake the sister but I bet he disturbed the neighbours too.

Thankfully it all changed after a round of shopping trip on Sunday. We went out around 1pm and he didn't nap for 4 hours straight (cause I guess he was too excited with all the people and surroundings or maybe he just dislike napping in the stroller just like the sister) that he knocked off from 5pm all the way till 7am in the morning. He only woke up twice for feeds with no issues going back to sleep on his own. Yesterday night he was the same :-). Fingers crossed that he will remain with this sleeping habit. Maybe I should bring him out 'shopping' more often on weekends... hehehe

When I told my friends about this, the only question they asked me is 'did he sleep too much in the day?'. Well good question. I suspected so as well but then when I confronted the babysitter she said he slept like usual in the day. Well, I guess that is the price to pay when you are not taking care of your kids yourself...

My minnie maid

2011-04-12T06:05:00.007+08:00

My minnie maid has been volunteering everyday to:

wipe the dining table after dinner (doing a pretty good job too)

pushing back the chairs nicely

hanging her lil brother's socks/booties to dry. She will hang the papa's underwear if I am doing our laundry instead :-)

wiping the floor herself if she dropped food on the floor

rocking the lil brother to sleep if he's crying and we're busy

entertaining the lil brother if he wants to play but we're busy

when I am complaining that I have so much housework to do and don't have time to play with her, she will offer to help me (she will say it in a pitiful voice like she's pitying me :-))

Now I understand why some people said it is nice to have an older girl as they will be more willing to help around the house (when they are not in their devil mode). Maybe boys will too, I do not know for sure as I do not have an older boy to compare :-)

Now to the ugly side of her. Of late, my minnie maid also developed the habit of biting her nails (she bit for a while when she was 2 ish but has stopped for a pretty long time) and also the straws of her water bottle. She is using one of those Bros bottle with straw and I think I have changed her straws like 4 or 5 times in the last month since she started developing this habit. She will take her own sweet time to bite the straw bit by bit until they get so short that it will be difficult for her to suck. I've sat down and talked with her, threatened and even beat her hands (started with 1x on day 1, 2x on day 2 and I stopped at 5x on day 5)but of no use. I didn't catch her doing it at home and the babysitter said she didn't do it at her place either so I think she picked up all these and actually doing it in school. She told me one day that one of her friend (I forgot the name she mentioned) bit her straw too.

I finally told the headmistress and requested for her help as well as the teacher's to monitor this and to warn her if they catch her doing it in school. I hope it will stop soon as they ran out of straws at the stores and she's currently using her last one. I don't want to waste money buying more bottles as she already has 2 similar ones at home now. The funny part about her is if you ask her whether she bit her straws (knowing that I will beat her if she did), she will still admit and when I ask her to lift up her hand, she will obliged with very little resistance.... you say la!

see the tip! this is just the beginning

Apart from the biting habits, she's also very clumsy or I would think that she's too hasty. She will constantly trip and fall or ran too fast and fall and will often bang into things. She has so many bruises/blue blacks on both her legs that I have eventually lost count.

Random photos of my precious gems

2011-04-06T06:22:00.003+08:00

CAR [ticked]

2011-04-06T05:33:00.004+08:00

Yesterday I personally reached a milestone. I paid off my car after 55 months. It felt relieved. I no longer have to pay for it anymore and can put the supposed installments to good use going forward. It is so nice to have some spare cash :-).

I bought this car when it was 18 months old. A 2nd hand car. My 2nd car. This car served me very well (as opposed to my first car which will burn a big hole in my pocket once every year for the 3 years I've owned it) in the last 55 months and in return I treated it well too. Even though it has passed its warranty period long time ago, it still gets pampered and checked only at the Toyota workshop which we all know costs a lot more than going to any of the mechanics out there. Never mind that I paid more, I believe in karma. If you treat something or someone well, you will get treated well in return :-)

I hope it will continue to serve me well despite being 73 months old and will not give me any major headaches now that it has passed the critical mark (you know how most cars will start making noises and have things falling out from God knows where once they have reached a certain age?!). I love my car, it looks handsome and charming and I am definitely not planning to change it anytime soon!

Counting my blessings

2011-04-02T06:11:00.007+08:00

One day I was complaining about me being too skinny. The next day I suddenly felt very blessed. It must be the hormones playing up :-). But I ain't complaining, I like it when the 'good' hormones are acting up.. haha

But honestly I do feel very blessed and sometimes I just want to reminisce and be thankful for everything surrounding me, enjoy my life and not worry or fret so much over little things. Looking at all the shocking things happening around the world, you just might not know when one day earthquake will struck KL right? Life is too short. I want to leave (if it's time to leave) a happy and fulfilled person :-). Occasionally I will forget (we're only humans) but I will list it down, and maybe print and stick it behind my door so I am reminded everytime I leave the house.

Here is my simple list. I am thankful for being blessed with:

2 healthy kids - they do get the occasional fever, flu and cough but I think that is very minor comparing to what some kids are going through.
a roof over my head - we're not rich, we don't stay in a big house but we have a home.
a wonderful husband - he helps with the kids and cooks.
a job - it puts food on the table and allows me to occasionally splurge on the things I want without having to depend on anyone.
a bunch of true friends - friends who listens and care and who you know you can rely on when you need them
supportive family - my siblings and my mom who will be there when I really need them

What more do I need right? Right!

And oh, I am now going through the 'hair dropping' stage which I am not thankful for. The hair on the bed, the floor and the bathroom is just scary...I hope it will stop or else I will go bald soon...

Skinny me

2011-03-30T07:06:00.005+08:00

I am one of the lucky few (or maybe unlucky to some) who tends to lose weight very quickly after child birth. I was back to my usual weight around Zac's full moon and would continue to lose weight slowly unless I stop breastfeeding.

I would get so skinny that I would look lethargic and frail. I could no longer fit nicely into my jeans or clothes and would look like I am wearing clothes I borrowed from someone else. Some of my friends even commented that all that is left is just my head! As I am also slightly tanned, I look really horrible (will look even more tanned) if I lose too much weight. My mom will ask me each time she see me if I have been in the sun although I have not!

During Hayley's time, I stopped breastfeeding at 8 months because I was getting thinner and thinner and my sister advised me to stop breastfeeding for my own sake. With Zac, even at 5 months, I am already having problems fitting nicely into my clothes. I am not going to shop for new clothes because I don't think I can easily find XXS and I know when I stop breastfeeding I will eventually return to my usual weight and the clothes will then be too tight for me.

Do any of you out there experience similar problems? Is this even a problem? I don't know. I just hate looking at my closet in the morning and not having anything suitable to wear despite it being full to the brim. And I get concerned when people ask me why I am so skinny and why I look so lethargic! I want to look good and not sick!

I tried to put on weight by eating more than the usual. I snack anytime I want to, I eat before I sleep, I eat all sorts of healthy and unhealthy stuff but I am still the same except that I developed a tummy because of my bad eating habits. I worry that if I let it get out of control by eating too much, I might have problems controlling my portions when I eventually stopped breastfeeding.

How long can it last?

2011-03-28T06:59:00.005+08:00

Since Zac was born, I or should I say WE have never had more than 6 hours of sleep straight in a night. I am just wondering how long our body can last without getting sufficient sleep and what damage it will do to us?

I sleep around 10 / 11pm each night with Hayley and will get up around 4am to express and take over the shift from papa. Papa will sleep from 4 / 5am and will need to get up around 7.30am to get Hayley ready for school (during which I am already on the way to drop off Zac and then to work). After dropping off Hayley at 8.15am, papa will return to continue his sleep until about noon. This routine sort of interrupted papa's work although he works from home.

Hopefully when Zac turned 6 months (just 1 more month to go), we can start training him to sleep through the night without feeds and I can relax a little on expressing and won't need to express so frequently anymore. Hopefully by then we can all get sufficient sleep each night.

Zac's Update: 4+ months

2011-03-22T12:21:00.004+08:00

At 4+ months, I:

can roll sideways like a pro (from back to tummy and vice versa but only on my right side)
experienced my first mild flu and cough which led to sore throat. I refused milk for a few days and made my mummy very nervous. Doctor prescribed some paracetamol for my throat and I am now able to drink without feeling any pain.
can grab or hold on to my toys.
still need my milk at night (same amount), turning my mummy/papa into pandas.
think I want to start solid soon as I drool and move my tongue when I see others eating food. Mummy promised to start me with cereals when I turn 5 months.
like to stick out my tongue and can imitate mummy or papa when they stick out their tongue
am officially off mittens.. hurray.. and I don't scratch my face
still love to suck my thumb and fingers

I just had my 3rd haircut last week. This time I was terrified of the noise made by the shaver and cried the entire time. I also hate when the hair gets into my mouth and my eyes.

I also had my check up on Monday and I now weight 7.425kg. Doctor said my weight is above average and my height is just average. He called me chubby and told mummy not to be too worried if I refuse milk once in a while. I also had my 3rd Pneumococal, 3rd DTP & Polio & Hib as well as my 3rd Hep B jab. I am so glad that there will be no more mandatory jabs until I turn 1.

Before my hair cut

My new hair cut

Zac's turn to be sick

2011-03-17T07:01:00.003+08:00

My poor boy. It finally happened to him. Now he's having some slight runny nose and occasional cough. Sigh... I guess with him being near me and the ceh ceh (in case you're wondering, Hayley is still having her runny nose and cough and me still having my cough) isn't helping either. All these runny nose and cough is like a marathon... never ending...despite all the medications and visits to the doctors.

I read somewhere on the web that if I am unwell and I am breastfeeding, there is a high chance that I might pass the bug to the baby BUT if the baby do catch whatever I have, it will be less serious than what I am having and it will help him build better immune for the future. I sincerely do hope that this is true. Let's just hope that my breastmilk will help make him stronger.

I wish and pray that we will all get well very very soon...

Sick people at home

2011-03-05T06:04:00.004+08:00

Hayley started it, she has got this marathon runny nose (been for weeks now) which eventually lead to cough. She has got serious cough, those where she will cough until she throw up! She even had nose bleed one time which scared the hell out of me. I have never seen so much blood coming out of her nose before and panicked and forgot to take photos. Ever since her runny nose started, she developed this nose picking habit. She kept telling me there are things in her nose - referring to those dried up mucus. Don't know if she picked up the habit from school or anywhere else. She will pick her nose whenever she's in bed or whenever we are not watching. This habit plus me constantly asking her to blow her nose must have injured or caused a rupture in the small veins in the lining of the nose. Anyway, I really don't want it to happen again so we are now trying hard to stop this habit of hers and hopefully her runny nose will go away soon. She started taking her med last Friday (1 week now) and will be finishing her med soon and the runny nose is still there (haiz). Looks like we might have to pay another visit to the paed and ask her for a stronger med that will work.

As for me, I somehow caught the runny nose bug from her which lead to cough and subsequently FEVER! On Wed I tried to self cure (trying to avoid taking medication since I am still breastfeeding) with panadols and sleep. It didn't work. On Thurs I was forced to see a doctor as I felt horrible (lethargic, hot, joints aching) plus I was worried that I might pass on the germs to Zac or papa if this prolonged. I was given 7 types of medication for flu, fever, cough, pain and inflammation. On Fri, I still felt lousy in the morning but subsequently felt better in the afternoon. I still have some cough but thankfully no more fever. At times like this I really wish the maid was here...maid oh maid... where are you????

Looks like what my sis said was true. She told me once my little kiddo starts going to school, she will get sick and she will bring back those germs and make the entire household sick. And everyone at home will take turns to fall sick. Looks like it is happening already.

Now I am trying hard to stay away from Zac and keep Hayley away from him as well, which of course is a very difficult thing to do. I also need to constantly remind papa to take his multivitamins and vit C to make sure he stays healthy.

Once Hayley gets better I am going to beef up her immune system. The paed advised me to give her fish oil, multivitamins, vit C and probiotics. She is currently taking fish oil, multivitamins and vit c. I need to find some good probiotics for her. Any good recommendation?

Zac's Update: 3+ months

2011-02-25T05:17:00.006+08:00

At 3+ months, I:

started going to the babysitter's
like to play and will chuckle and laugh when played with
love sucking my fingers
am trying very hard to roll sideways, with success occasionally but sometimes my hand still gets in the way
can stay on my tummy for quite a long time
love to cry before I sleep, driving mummy and papa nuts
still need my milk in the middle of the night, at least 1 bottle
am still drinking 5.5oz every 3 hrs and have recently been introduced to 'water'
know what grouchy means and I enjoy practising it
sleep in the bassinet (at home) and sarong (at aunty's). I can't sleep in my cot.
throw up after feeds, sometimes little, sometimes a lot, I don't know why

My next visit to to paed will be in March so I don't know how much weight I have gained this month but mummy said she's tired carrying me and I seem to have almost outgrown the baby car seat.

My babysitter is driving me up the wall

2011-02-23T05:52:00.005+08:00

First my son and now my babysitter. Isn't life great?! :-(

Every morning when I send my son to her or when we pick him up in the evening there will definitely be 'things' to hear. Sometimes it will be the same 'things' over and over and I am just so so bored. And for some reasons she only targets me, not papa.

My babysitter told me she has many years of experience being a babysitter and during her younger days she even worked in a playschool/kindergarten so she knows all about babies, kids and playschool. I honestly don't know what she knows. All I know is she likes to use all the 'old school' methods in bringing up kids. Some I am fine with, some I am not but similar to having a maid, I just have to close one eye, sometimes I close both eyes.

There are so many things that she do or say which drives me literally up the wall. You be my judge:

likes to use powder on my kids, both my kids. Said lotion is bad for them. Go figure!
thinks she's my breastfeeding guru. Suggests that my way of storing, warming and transporting milk could be the cause of Zac's constant throw up after feeds. To me it was nothing alarming as he's constantly growing, to her, it seems like the end of the world. She even suggests that Zac could be intolerant to breast milk!
wants to give water to Zac who is 100% on breast milk. Said she is worried that he might not want water when he's on formula next time if we don't start the habit now (this is ok la, I can accept)
prefers to let babies wear their mittens until 6 - 8 months old. Said she didn't want them to scratch their faces. When will Zac be able to learn how to grip? I also don't know.
3 years ago - your daughter got a lot of wind. 3 years later - your son got a lot of wind. Could it be the breast milk?, you didn't feed them properly?, you didn't burp them? Seems to be my fault all the time!
prefers scheduled feeding. Said it will be better and easier for us (I wonder if it's easier for her or for us?!). She is trying to train my son to drink every 3 hours. Told her it's breast milk, some diluted some thick so follow his demand. She said can be trained. My poor boy.
whine and whine. Everyday telling me I have a very difficult boy and I am going to suffer when he grow up. Said the same thing during Hayley's time and now she said my boy is worst than Hayley.
against child specialist. She claimed that doctors doesn't know everything.
change her opinion or facts very frequently. I asked her to give Hayley cheese, one a day will be ok. She said cheese is not good for kids, too salty and I should not give her everyday. But everyday when I pick Hayley up, she's eating cheese... and this is just one of the many incidences.
spoil my kids - Hayley at age 3 is very choosy with food. I try to force her to eat everything at home and she will tell me not to force her. Asked me to be patient as she will change when she grow up. If she can advise me as such, I wonder what Hayley is eating when she's at her place? I don't dare to think.

The list can go on and on. I am sure some of you will be wondering why I am still sending my kids to her when I am so unhappy with her. Well there are several reasons:

she is the only babysitter I know and she charged a very reasonable price
although she isn't perfect, I know she love my daughter (will need to give her some more time to love my son). This is the most important factor to me.
she is flexible and easy to deal with ie not calculative.
my daughter seems to be happy going to her place indicating that she is well treated (you need to be worried if your kids refused to go to the babysitter's as something could be wrong)

I am feeling so much better after pouring these out.. thanks for reading :-)

My boy is driving us up the wall

2011-02-21T05:21:00.005+08:00

Don't know what is wrong with Zac. Since last week (ie since we've placed him at the babysitter's), he's been very difficult. Every time after his feeds he will be a smiley and happy baby but 1 hour down the road he showed signs of sleepiness but then will not sleep and keeps screaming and shouting (without tears), like sounds of protests! Unless we carry him, he just won't stop. I really miss my old Zac :-(

We've tried rocking him in the bassinet, we've tried carrying and rocking him manually, we've tried the sarong (this works only sometimes) and we even tried putting him on his tummy and patting him... but most of it won't work. He will scream and shout until he gets so tired that he finally falls asleep.

Could it be that the babysitter carried him too much at her place?

Well she did complain to me that he's very difficult to handle. He keeps crying when he's sleepy but just won't go to sleep (she said the same thing to me everyday!).

What is wrong with my boy la? What is it that he wants? Haiz... I am going insane soon.

Birthday celebration at school

2011-02-18T07:03:00.006+08:00

Her birthday cake

All the cute faces

Look at all the excited faces, priceless :-)

Goodie bags for her friends... I told her 'mummy made this for you so you can give to your friends on your birthday. It's your present to your friends'.

Then she stared at me, wide eyed and smiled, and then hugged and kissed me and said 'you did this for me????? thank you mummy'.

She received a card signed by all her friends and a cute little birthday present from her headmistress.

As parents are not allowed in school, the teachers helped with the photo taking and making sure the kids had a fun time.. thank you teachers :-).

Happy 3rd Birthday Hayley

2011-02-14T05:20:00.010+08:00

We celebrated Hayley's 3rd birthday, just the 4 of us on Sunday (instead of her actual day today) and I'll let the photos do most of the story telling:

Lunch at McD, her choice

Dessert of her choice

Her birthday present from me, her first doll (believe it or not?)

Seen here hugging 'Bubbles', the name we gave her doll.

I love the message on the shirt! LOL

And she got an angpow from papa... boring....

Her birthday cake that costs me RM31! All because it has 2 hearts in it and it is for Valentine's Day. I bought another similar one for her school and it is at least 3X bigger than this one (it is approx 0.8kg) and it cost me only RM39!

Ms Poser

As we sang her the birthday song, she was so shy (and happy) that she clung on to my thighs to hide her face.

Family photo, papa is obviously the cameraman

Blowing out the candle

Our dinner plan was ruined by the sudden heavy downpour that lasted till rather late. In the end we had Maggie Mee at home (sigh). It was my 2nd time feeding the unhealthy Maggie Mee to Hayley (the 1st was about 2 weeks ago) and she loved it to bits. I am quite sure she had it before at the babysitter's judging from her reaction. She almost finished 1 pack all by herself.

Today, she will be having a small party at school. I've prepared the cake, the camera and the goodie bags. Will share the photos later.

Lastly, happy 3rd birthday baby. You are now '3'. Papa, mummy and Zac loves you!!

Maid oh maid, where are you???

2011-02-13T09:26:00.003+08:00

It has been almost 4 weeks and our maid is still not here.. SIGH SIGH SIGH...

Tomorrow I am going back to work and I will have to take leave again when she arrived to properly guide and train her. I hope my boss won't kill me.

We actually paid additional so we can get the maid in 2 weeks and we paid our deposit on January 18th but now it's been 4 weeks. So how? Do we ask her to pay us back the additional since she didn't keep her promise of delivering the maid in 2 weeks?

I have been in touch with her quite often and she kept telling me they're having issues with the long holiday, with flight arrangements and immigration. I know she's definitely not pulling my leg but I am just so upset that the entire arrangement is not going according to my plans.

Time to let go..

2011-02-07T05:11:00.004+08:00

Tomorrow Zac is officially going to the babysitter's and I am already beginning to miss him. Sigh.. why does it have to be so hard everytime! I think I am going crazy. It is not like I am not going to see him in the evening but still I find it so hard to let go.

We are sending him a week early (I start work on the 14th) to give the babysitter and myself sometime to adjust. She and her husband needs to manage a 3 year old (half day), a 6 months old and a 3 months old full day. I really really hope she can cope.

The last 3 months although tiring, has been very fulfilling to see how he has grown. Every minute spent with him was a joy. I really envy those mothers who can quit their jobs to stay home permanently with their kids. Teaching them, loving them and guiding them the right way, all the way.

Sigh.. I am so going to cry tomorrow and papa already told me he didn't want to come with me tomorrow as he didn't want to see me cry. How not to miss this la....

GONG XI FA CAI

2011-02-04T14:27:00.005+08:00

We would like to take this opportunity to wish everyone GONG XI FA CAI...

Note: this card is Hayley's very first art project from school. I would like to think that she contributed in making it but she kept telling "no wor mummy, teacher made this".. sigh... why

does she have to be so honest ah?

Hayley's bob

2011-01-25T05:09:00.005+08:00

To make life easier for everyone, papa and I with a heavy heart finally decided to cut her hair.... we had to bribe her with a lollipop :-(

Zac's Update: 2+ month

2011-01-25T04:33:00.007+08:00

At 2+ month, I:

smile more
like to have conversation and eye contact
can turn my head in all directions following your every movement
like to play with my toys and sometimes enjoy watching TV
like to lick my hands and mittens, sometimes I even like to lick my mom's shirt or shoulder
can lift up my head for a longer period of time
drink 5-6 oz of mummy's milk every 2.5 - 3 hrs, sometimes I demand for more whenever I feel like it
have various preference for sleeping method, sometimes I like to be carried and pat at the same time, sometimes I like to be left alone to sleep on my own, sometimes I like to be rocked in the bassinet and sometimes I like to sleep on my parent's thighs
can sleep for longer periods at night, 5 (mostly) - 8 (once a blue moon) hours straight
developed rashes on my cheeks, Dr Choy (my paediatrician) said I have sensitive skin

I am currently at 6.5kg and had my 2nd Pneumococal jab, 2nd DTP & Polio & Hib jab and my last Rota Virus. I also had my second hair cut (not displayed in any of the photos below). I want to look good for CNY ma :-)

Hair pulling day

2011-01-21T04:36:00.003+08:00

Today is one of those days where Hayley drove papa and I up the wall, the entire day. I've always blogged about her being picky with food, not wanting to eat, being difficult during meal times and today is the day where she displayed all of the above to the max. I would like to share this with all the mummies out there who may be reading my blog and I would certainly like to hear from any of you if I have done anything wrong or if there is a way that I could have done better.

She woke up at 8am this morning and refused milk. Thinking that she may not be hungry 'yet' or probably she didn't have appetite as she's been having runny nose for a week now I thought I would let her be for about 30 mins before asking her again. For the past few days it has been difficult trying to get her to finish a bottle of milk before school. 30 mins later I asked her again and she insisted that she didn't want and said that she was not hungry. She asked me for a slice of cheese. I gave her the cheese and after a few mouths she said it was 'too big' and she couldn't finish it. She has this habit of breaking up some of the cheese into small pieces and then eating only the really tiny ones and kept the big pieces where she would stack them up and eat them real slowly later. I insisted that she finished the cheese and it took her almost 30 mins to finish the small slice of cheese. I also offered her hot dog bun and she took a bite and said she didn't want anymore. I offered her biscuits and milk again about 15 mins later which she refused.

We served her lunch at 12.30pm (soup, fish and egg, ie things she will eat) and I gave her a portion which I think is small for her age but because she didn't seem to have the appetite, I didn't want to force her to eat up a huge portion and risk her throwing up (another bad habit of hers). Half way through the meal she spilled the soup on the table and I smacked her hand once cause I have warned her not to touch the hot soup. She cried, coughed and then threw up a portion of the food. I sent her to the corner. She sat there crying for like 30 mins.

After all the crying, we sent her to nap and she asked for milk. We gave her a bottle of milk. She woke up 2 hours later and for tea time she asked for another slice of cheese. She got her cheese and I offered her biscuits, buns, fruits and yogurt. She wanted yogurt. Gave her the yogurt and after 2 or 3 spoons, she didn't want it. A slice of cheese is all she had for tea time.

We had dinner at 7pm and half way through she complained that there were fish in her mouth and she didn't want fish and spat out whatever is in her mouth. We warned her never to do that again. After a couple more mouths, she again complained about fish in her mouth and spat out another time. This time we raised our voice (we didn't hit her at all) and she began crying and coughing and was about to throw up. We gave her 2 options, either to finish her meal or go to the corner. She said she didn't want to go to the corner but she wasn't touching her food either. After about 5 mins (she wasn't eating) I sent her to the corner. She only had half the bowl of rice. She stood at the corner for about 30 mins, crying.

Before sending her to bed at 9pm, we asked if she would like some milk and she said 'yes, but small small bottle only' indicating that she only wanted a small portion. We made the usual portion and she complained about 'powder' in her milk (lately she often complained that she could taste powder in her milk and would like us to take it out and we have to pretend to go to the kitchen and pour some out to make her happy!) and she finished it and went off to bed.

So for the entire day my almost 3 year old had 1 bowl of rice, 2 bottles of 6oz milk, 2 slices of cheese, a couple spoons of yogurt and 1 bite of the hot dog bun. So what do you think? Can any of you shed some light before we both lose all our hair?

Maid

2011-01-18T04:27:00.010+08:00

Would you hire a maid?

We just did. Yes we did. We have finally paid our deposit for a Filipino maid and she will be arriving in about 2 weeks. We have been thinking about this decision for weeks and finally decided that we should just go for it. I have always protested against the idea because I dislike having a stranger at home, what if we got a cuckoo one? what if she is crazy? what if she's actually giving me more headaches (like those we always hear about) rather than helping me out? and most importantly will it be safe for my kids to be around a stranger?

Normally people would hire a maid to help with chores at home and to ease the burden of sending too many kids to the babysitter. For us, hiring a maid is actually more costly, something we are prepared to pay in hope of exchanging for quality life with the kids. I am starting to feel the toll on my body having to juggle housework and the kids and I fear to think if I will be able to cope when I need to be back at work in a couple of weeks. My work is no easy peasy stuff, it requires a lot of my attention (even weekends and after hours) and occasionally working late and I certainly do not want to be worried if papa will survive alone with the kids. An extra pair of hands during times like these is all we need. Also, I want to have quality life with my family, time to read to Hayley, time to play with Zac and time spent with papa instead of spending most of my time on folding clothes, washing dishes, sweeping the floor, changing the bedsheets etc.

Hopefully with a good maid, I will be able to free myself from the house chores and actually get to spend some quality time with my loved ones. As papa mostly work from home, he will be able to supervise the maid most of the time. We are also planning to install some CCTVs at home for a peace of mind as he does needs to be out occasionally. Hopefully these will be sufficient.

Even with a maid, Zac will still continue to be at aunty's. I do not trust a stranger with an infant. Call me kiasu, I am just being safe. As for Hayley, we will continue to send her to aunty's after school for a few months while we monitor the maid. We'll judge her performance in a few months and let our instinct tell us if we are comfortable to let her take care of Hayley. Hayley should be old enough by now (we hope) to tell us if the maid is being nasty to her.

With a maid and kids at babysitter's, it means we will need to squeeze our belts tighter each month. Come to think of it, our maid practically gets paid and doesn't have much to do :-). We're a small family with a small house and I'm not letting her touch my kids unless I am at work. Anyway, both papa and I agreed that if we get a good maid, we will enjoy her assistance for 2 years and then decide if we wish to renew her contract. If we didn't get a good one this time around or felt that we didn't like where things are going, we'll just scrap the idea and consider it as a lesson learnt (and have tremendous 'heart pain' for many days to come on the money wasted) and we shall try no more. Like my sister always said (she has an Indo maid by the way), 'You never try you never know. So just give it a try and see if this solution works better for you. Why suffer housework?'.

I really really hope that I will get a good one and I will know how to handle her and I won't treat her 'too' nice (our agent said that is a common mistake with all first time employers) and gave her the impression that she can take me for granted. I always tell myself that maids are humans too and they should be treated with respect. I don't even mind if she wants to sit on the dining table and have dinner with us together. My motto is 'If you treat me well, I will treat you well'.

So now I need to prep up a room for the maid which means more work for me until she arrives :-( and make some adjustments to our home. I am sure I will need a few days or weeks to adapt to having someone new at home with us 24 hours a day. If anyone has any good tips to share on how to be a good employer or how to make the best of your maid, please share :-)

Hayley goes to school

2011-01-06T13:47:00.007+08:00

The first week of 2011 was a tiring week for me as well as for Hayley. My little baby is finally off to school. Looking at her in her school uniform sort of reminded me how quickly time flies. It was just like days ago that she was still in diapers, crawling and seeking my attention. Today she's all grown up, independent, brave and adventuring a new chapter in her life.

Sending her to school even before she touched 3 was a decision that papa and I made together. Observing how outspoken and outgoing she was, we knew she wanted to have friends and to play with them. Sending her to school will also be much better than her spending lots of time in front of the TV. Moreover, she has been asking about school since she was 2.

It has been a week since she started schooling. I was probably more anxious than her the night before her very first day. Lots of worries came to mind - will she cry - will she be ok on her own - will she drive the teachers up the wall with her activeness - will she dislike school - will she bully her friends or will they bully her etc etc.

The first day
Waking her up in the morning wasn't as bad as I thought. We gave her an alarm clock and taught her how to turn on and off the alarm. We taught her step by step what needed to be done to get to school on time and started reminding her several days earlier.

When we got to school, her first question as soon as we stepped into the gate was 'is this my school?'. Then on I knew she will be ok. Then we taught her where to put her shoes (there is a dedicated spot at the shoe rack with her name on it) and she was able to recognise her own name. She was also required to put her school bag in the same compartment (also with her name on it) and her drinking bottle in a dedicated place.

Then one of the teacher got her a chair and asked her to play blocks with other friends. After observing her for about 15 mins in the classroom, I stepped out and stayed outside until it ends.

After about 30 mins, many other kids started crying. Mine still didn't cry. Some cried for the whole day. Occasionally she would come to the door and check if I was still outside. Upon seeing my face, she happily went back inside to play. Other than playing with everything she could reach in the classroom, she also likes to climb upstairs (it was a double storey house) to see what was up there (classroom for 4 years olds). The teachers told me they have to constantly go up to bring her down or stopped her before she reached the top. I would occasionally peep through the window to see how she was doing and would constantly not find her in her chair. She would either be walking around or playing with other toys or fighting for toys with other kids etc.

At the end of the day I put her in a stranger's car (a dedicated uncle that will be driving her back to the babysitter's after class everyday) and she didn't even complain or cry. She asked me to follow and I told her I will but I will need to drive my own car and she said ok. I trailed uncle's car all the way to make sure she was ok. Upon reaching babysitter's place, she happily jumped out from uncle's car into babysitter's arms. She was happy.

2nd - 4th day
The rest of the days went by similarly and I didn't accompany her anymore. Teachers said she was ok and didn't cry although she did ask for me occasionally. They also said that she was more active compared to other kids, not hyperactive but just active and suggested that I reduce her sugar intake and probably consider changing her formula to something less sweet.

The babysitter also told me she was really tired upon reaching her home everyday and napped for a pretty long time. I guess even energizer bunny will run out of battery :-).

5th day
She didn't sleep well the night before and woke up pretty early and complained to me that she was tired. I asked her to stay home but she insisted on going to school. After taking half a bottle of her milk, she threw up. I asked her again to stay home but she refused. I sent her to school in an empty stomach and a heavy heart.

I went to pick her up as I didn't want her to wait 30 mins for the uncle as I knew she was tired. Teachers said she had runny nose but otherwise she was ok. She didn't have runny nose in the morning :-(. I quickly sent her to the babysitter's and told her to give her lots of rest and fluid.

I guess going to school 5 half days in a row for the first time is very taxing for a 3 year old. Hopefully she will be able to adapt quickly otherwise I will consider reducing her schooling days (hopefully I don't have to). I also knew that she will be getting sick more frequently (heard it from everyone) once she started school but wasn't expecting the bugs to hit her this quickly.

To me, the hardest part about schooling is explaining to her why she won't need to go to school on Saturdays, Sundays and public holidays as well as asking her to stay away from Zac whenever she was unwell.

The big sister

2010-12-23T12:31:00.005+08:00

The big sister loves her brother although she sometimes showed it the wrong way. Whenever she is back from the babysitter, the first thing she will ask about is 'where is baby?'. She likes to stroke his hair, touch him, disturb him and play with him. Whenever he cries, she will try to console him and ask him not to cry. Whenever I am bathing or changing Zac's diaper, she will want to be involved, either standing at the side to see and touch or play with everything from lotion or baby bath etc. She will also help with bringing his hanky, diaper, napkins or whatever we ask of her.

She likes to ride her tricycle in her house and will sometimes bang into Zac's bouncinet with Zac in it sleeping. She sometimes like to rock the playpen again with Zac in it sleeping. Sometimes when I am with Zac she will want me to pay attention to her but with a little bit of explanation, she will understand and stop demanding. Never once she will hit Zac or do anything nasty to him.

Although she is not even 3, I am quite proud of her.

Zac's Update: 1+ month

2010-12-23T12:21:00.005+08:00

At 1+ month I can:

smile a lot
look you in the eye and interact
goo goo gaa gaa occasionally
drinks 5oz of mummy's milk every 2.5 - 3 hrs
demand to be carried when I want to be carried
sleep and play whenever I feel like it be it day or night

I am currently at 5.39kg and had my 1st Pneumococal jab, 1st DTP & Polio & Hib jab and Rota Virus. I also had my very first hair cut.

Before

After

The Panda Mummy

2010-12-09T12:47:00.005+08:00

Zac is now 1 month 9 days old. How time flies. During the first month with aunty Foong around I was enjoying the moments, was telling myself and papa that 'hey it wasn't that scary after all'. After aunty Foong left, the reality finally kicked in. I was so tired the first few days that I didn't have the mood to do anything, not updating my blog account or reading any of your posts etc. Apart from looking after a baby, I had to do housework, do dishes, look after a hyper and attention seeking 2 year old, I was simply exhausted.

Having to adjust myself again to such hectic lifestyle was certainly no easy task, especially at my age. On the first night alone with Zac I was so scared. I wasn't sure if I could manage him alone. I thought I came up with a good idea by letting him latch whenever he was hungry thinking that I could get some sleep, you know where people always say you can let the baby suck sideways while you are both sleeping and you can continue to sleep?! It didn't work! He sucked for like 5 - 10 mins and then fell asleep or puke. 30 mins later he wanted to suck again and this went on for the entire night. I was horrified and zombified. The subsequent nights I didn't let him latch anymore. Although he wasn't sleeping through, at least he will sleep for 2-3 hours before the next feed and it was definitely much better than latching (although I still had to wake up to express frequently) and papa could help in between.

The first few nights was tough. My body was trying to adjust to the new schedules and I almost gave up. Thankfully it got easier after a few nights. Although occasionally Zac refused to sleep at night (and sleep all day), he wasn't that difficult to deal with. We had to introduce him to the pacifier (something we didn't have to do with Hayley) as he would scream very loudly the moment he was awake asking for milk that he would wake the sister. This boy got no patience!

I also had to learn all over again on how to bath a baby, picking up his signals on how he liked to be carried, what the different type of cries meant etc.. things I have long forgotten. As things got easier with Zac, it was a different story with Hayley.

We're not sure if she's trying to seek attention or she's just simply getting naughtier as she gets older. Our main problem with her is that she is a very picky eater. You can feed her something be it porridge or rice and it will take her ages to finish it. You can give her a slice of apple and again it will take her ages. Sometimes she will pretend to vomit and actually end up really vomitting out the food to tell us that she didn't like it. A few times we lost our patience (because it is becoming a habit) and actually smacked her but she will still repeat the same the next day. She's also very hard headed and will not listen to anything we say. She is really testing our patience. We constantly tell her how much we love her and spent time with her so she won't feel left out. I also heard from a lot of mummies with 2 kids telling me the same thing and they assured me that it will get better over time and all I can do now is hope that it will come sooner.

And oh, here are some photos of the little boy:

My boy who loves to smile, and he's got a dimple too just like me :-)

A cute little cake on his fullmoon courtesy of aunty Jessie

Zac with aunty Foong.

Aunty Foong cried the day she left as she really loved Zac :-(

She even called the following day to ask about Zac and me.

Zac at the fullmoon party, sleeping through.

Confinement is over

2010-11-29T14:26:00.002+08:00

For the last few weeks I have not been updating my blog because I was busy eating, resting, watching TV and milking :-). All these will come to an end on Tuesday when Aunty Foong leaves and I will be left on my own to manage 2 kids, scared nya.

I don't like confinement periods. I don't like not being able to bath and wash my hair as and when I like, I don't like being sweaty all the time because of the heaty stuff I have to eat, I don't like confinement foods, I don't like drinking red dates water everyday (I miss plain water) and I don't like being confined to home but I will miss Aunty Foong.

Aunty Foong is my confinement lady. She cooks for me, boils water for my daily usage, takes care of my needs, looks after Zac and sleeps with Zac at night so I can get some rest in between my milking hours. Aunty Foong who is almost 60 is a good confinement lady and comes from Kuala Langat. I can't really comment on her cooking skills as I am not into confinement foods so whatever she cooks I will just eat eventhough I don't really like it. Aunty Foong often comment that I am a small eater and I don't know how to eat.. haha.

For the last one month she even cooks dinner for papa and Hayley and clean up after them which most confinement lady will not do as it is not part of their job. Although she sometimes will have her own ways/ideas in the things she do which I might not agree with, she did teach me a thing or two on what I should or should not eat and how best to care for a baby. I will also miss chatting with her, she's very '8' and likes to gossip about people from her hometown with me :-).

I have had 2 confinements, 1 with the help of a confinement lady and 1 without. For those who will be having a baby soon, I highly recommend hiring a good confinement lady to help you get through the healing period. For me, the experience was very different and I truly enjoy having Aunty Foong at home.

I am sure Zac will miss her too.

Need more breast milk storage bottles/bags

2010-11-12T16:38:00.002+08:00

Can anyone please recommend me what's the best method for storing breast milk in the freezer?

I have 8 Avent containers and 4 Avent 9oz bottles and they have all been used up. I need to get more containers for storing breast milk and not sure what's reliable, useful or efficient.

Can someone out there please help recommend me something good?

The day he arrived... (Part 2)

2010-11-10T18:12:00.004+08:00

Continued from here.....

After about 3-4 hours I was wheeled out from the OT, the anaesthetic started wearing off and I could finally feel the pain. Dr Lee mentioned that if needed I can ask for painkillers and the one that would work best would be the suppository type. As the pain was bearable, it was painful but not the end of the world kind of pain, so I decided to be a heroin and refused the painkillers. To be honest, I was more uncomfortable sleeping on the hospital bed than handling the pain from the wound. The hospital bed was so hard that I am sure I would end up with bed sores if I had to sleep an extra night. My buttocks and back were so sore that I have to move and change the pressure point every 30 mins but with the pain it was hard to move. And as I still had the drip on me plus the urine cathether, it was even harder.

I just lied there the entire night, only sitting up slightly assisted by the bed to breastfeed. I started breastfeeding the night itself. The nurse also offered me a glass of milo which I accepted happily. As it was a single bedded room, papa was allowed to sleep with me. He had to sleep on a reclining chair that squeaks a lot (ie very noisy). It didn't look at all comfortable but he will just have to make do. After the 11pm feed, papa went back home for a quick shower and returned about 2 hours later. During that time, the nurses came in to check on me every 15-30 mins, checking my blood pressure, heart beat and temperature. It was quite annoying honestly as I didn't really get to rest properly.

At about 3am the following day, the nurses stopped the drip but left the needle intact in my hand as I still need to be injected with antibiotics. I felt much better being able to move both my hands more freely now. Bun was also brought to me every 3-4 hours for feeds. I was able to feed him quite comfortably too.

The next morning around 6am, the nurses removed the urine cathether. You have no idea how relieved I was when it was removed. After a while I became worried. What if I needed to wee and I still can't walk? The nurses told me I will need to make an attempt to the toilet at least once before 12 noon otherwise they will need to put the urine cathether back in me.

At 8am they came back to give me a sponge bath and to change the sheets. After it was done they asked if I would like to try to sit on the chair. Papa was away for his breakfast. I braved myself and tried to sit up with the nurses' help. It was only 18 hrs after the surgery. I managed to sit on the bed but the moment they helped me up on my feet, the wound hurts so badly it felt like I was being ripped apart. I could make one small step using my left foot but not with my right. Immediately I could see blood dripping from down there onto the floor. The nurses said I must have stood up for too long and told me to get back on the bed. With a lot of pain, I got back onto the bed. My heart sank. I was constantly being reminded by nurses and doctors and friends that the sooner I walk, the faster I would heal. Imagine my disappointment when I could not walk.

Dr Lee came to check on me in the morning and I told him I could not walk as it was too painful. He prescribed me with some mild oral painkillers. The nurses came a few mins later with a little brown pill and 2 paracetamol. I took them hoping that it would help me walk faster. Dr Choy, Bun's paed also came to introduce himself and told me that Bun was doing very well and he was a healthy and heavy little baby.

Then around 12 noon the nurse came again to check if I have used the toilet. I told her I could not walk still and asked her if I could use the bed pan. She brought the bed pan and I cleared the bladder. It was about 800ml! The nurse then warned me that I cannot hold my bladder for so long as the fuller the bladder is, the harder it would be for the uterus to contract. Moreover, if the bladder is full it would hurt the uterus too. After relieving myself, I felt so much better. I was wondering if that was the reason why I could not walk in the morning... could it be because of the full bladder?

The rest of the day got by like usual, lots of nurses coming in and out for the routine checks, cleaners coming in to clean the room, breakfast, lunch and dinner being served. For the entire 3 days 2 nights I was there, I was given tasteless fish porridge for lunch and dinner. For breakfast I got 2 slices of bread with fish porridge for day 1 and 2 slices of bread with oats for day 2. Oh how I miss eating rice. I got milo 4x a day.

Around 5pm, after 5 hours of clearing my bladder, papa asked me to try and sit up again. This time it was just me and him. I held his neck tightly and he helped me up. I managed to sit down for a while and adjust to the pain. After about 10 mins, I was able to stand up and again had to remain standing for a while to adjust to the pain. I finally managed to walk a few small steps to sit on the chair next to the bed. I was so happy. Next mission is to walk to the toilet. As the nurses still needs to monitor my output 2 more times that day, I had to call them to help me to the toilet. Taking one small step at a time I was able to walk to the toilet and cleared my bladder. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.

After the first time, the subsequent times of getting up from bed, walking and sitting became easier and less painful. I got up a few more times that night to just walk around the room unassisted. I was so happy as this would secure my discharge tomorrow!

The next morning Dr Lee dropped by to visit and asked if I was independent to walk around, use the toilet etc which I proudly replied yes. Then he told me I could go home today and advised me to continue taking the painkillers for 2 more days just in case.

At around 1pm on Wed, I was finally discharged and was able to walk all the way from my ward to the car park. I was so happy that I don't have to sleep on the hard bed anymore.

The day he arrived... (Part 1)

2010-11-09T12:01:00.004+08:00

Everytime after having a baby, I told myself that I will never want to go through it again but a few months down the road after seeing how cute they grow up to be and what a joy to have them around, I forgot what I have been through and got myself in trouble again. So this time I have decided to document it so I can refer back and remind myself that I should not go through this again... and hopefully it works.. hahaha

On November 1st 2010 at 8.30am, we sent Hayley to the babysitter. Upon leaving her at the door, I could not hold back my tears and started crying. Aunty asked me what was wrong and she thought I was scared of what's coming next. I told her I will be scared later but now I am crying because I have to be away from Hayley for 2-3 days and it will be very tough for me. Everytime I am away from her longer than the usual working hours, I will miss her terribly, I will worry if she will be ok without us, and then the tears will automatically roll. Plus this is the first time she's actually not sleeping with us by her side. Aunty assured me that she will be ok and we left with a heavy heart, after a hug and kiss routine.

We drove straight to SDMC and got admitted around 9.45am. We requested for a single room (RM230 per night) but since none were available at that time, we were given a 2 bedded room (RM150 per night). I insisted to be on a waitlist for a single room. Around 10.30am, nurses came in to clean me up ie shave me and gave me a hospital gown. My elective c-sec has been scheduled for 2.30pm that day and since I have to fast, I spent my time filling up forms, watching TV, facebooking and updating my blog to keep my mind from thinking about the surgery. Papa went for a quick breakfast when I was getting cleaned up. Dr Lee also popped in to check on me and to inform me the name of the anaesthetician for the day. It was Dr Zurainah:-). He said she is very skillful and I am in good hands.

During the entire time I kept staring at the clock and got more and more nervous as we approach 1.30pm. I know in anytime they will be coming to get me. At exactly 2pm, they came in with a bed and wheeled me out into the OT. Papa followed but was only allowed to wait at the waiting area outside the OT.

I was wheeled into the reception area of the recovery bay where they asked me my name etc and some information as I have filled in the forms, probably to check and make sure that I am sane and I know what I am doing. Once everything has been clarified, they wheeled me into the recovery bay. Another boy of about 10 was in there with the mom probably waiting for his turn to undergo some surgery. I asked the nurses again if papa was allowed to accompany me (since the boy's mom was there) and they said no. After about 30 mins, Dr Zurainah came to introduce herself and inserted the needle on my left hand for the drip. Although she was gentle, it still hurts. I also took the opportunity to ask her about the various anaesthetics and she confirmed that spinal would be the best for baby and me, this method according to her and some studies I read on the web has the least complications.

Around 2.45pm, I was wheeled into the OT. You have no idea how fast my heart was beating at this time. I think at least 200 beats per min. The OT was cold and they transferred me onto the OT bed. The bed was small, if I turn either sides I would end up on the floor. I could see many nurses in the room preparing the things required for the surgery. I could hear Dr Lee's voice outside the OT. Then I was told to sit up, with my legs bent inwards and a pillow under my armpit forming the letter C. Dr Zurainah then sprayed something cold on my back and jabbed me with the spinal jab. I didn't dare to look and could not stop trembling and asked one of the nurses if I could hold her hand. I squeezed her hand so tightly but yet she didn't complain. The nurses there were very symphatetic and understanding. They kept comforting me that it will be painless and it will be over in a min. I can feel the needle being poked into my spine and then I can feel the sensations on the right leg but nothing on my left. Then I overheard Dr Zurainah saying something about it not being deep enough and I knew I will have to go through it again. She jabbed me again for the 2nd time and after a few seconds my feet felt very heavy. She asked me to lift them up and I couldn't. I have to say that the jab itself is less painful than the insertion of the drip on my hand.

After the magic potion kicked in, they inserted the urine catheter into me. Although it was painless, I could feel the sensations and I knew exactly what they were doing. It was extremely uncomfortable. Once everything is ready, they started putting up the cloth to block me from seeing what they were doing. They placed both my hands on the arm rest on my left and right forming the letter T. They covered my upper body with thick blankets as they saw me trembling. Suddenly my nose itched and I asked the nurse to help me scratch :-). After a couple of mins, I started feeling nauseous. I told Dr Zurainah and she said it was normal as my blood pressure was dropping, a side effect of the spinal jab. She said it wil be over in a few mins. It was a terrible feeling, lying down and felt like vomitting but she was right, it was over in a few mins.

Dr Lee then came in, spoke to me for a min, he said after the surgery I can have my milo and the ever famous chicken soup of SDMC. He really knows how to make people feel better. Then he asked the nurses 'everyone ready?' and 'can I start?'. Then they responded and said yes ready.

I couldn't feel when the knife or whatever was used to open me up but I know they were touching me and working on me. My body was being turned left and right and after about 10 mins I heard Dr Lee asking for a forcep. Then a nurse came over to my upper part and started pushing my baby downwards by pressing onto my tummy. After a few mins, I could feel the baby being taken out as I felt light. Seconds later I could see him on my left and heard his first cries... I cried too..

During the entire time I was just watching the baby. He cried so loudly and continuously while they were cleaning him up. The Dr and the nurses called him hero as he cried non stop. I couldn't really see his face but could see that he was huge, some of the nurses even joked that he looked like a 4kg baby and no wonder Dr Lee had to use a forcep!

As I kept my eyes on him, I could also hear Dr Lee and the nurses as well as the suction. They must be cleaning up the blood inside me. Dr Lee then started stitching me up as I could hear him say '1st layer' then '2nd layer' and finally 'last layer'. Before they began stitching me up, the nurses brought baby to show me and let me kiss him for the first time. They also showed his private part to me to confirm his gender. Then baby was taken out to be shown to papa. The stitching and cleaning up took at least another 30 mins and it felt like forever. After everything was done, the nurses flipped me over from left to right to clean up the blood. I could see cloths with blood on the floor and in plastic bags. Then they remove the cover that blocked me from seeing the surgery and I knew it was all over.

Dr Lee showed me his bloodied gloves and told me how big Bun's head was and he couldn't grab it and had to use a forcep. Then he said everything went well, and Bun is well but the forcep scar will remian for a day or 2. The scar was from his left cheeks crossing down to his lips and right chin. He also adds that if I need painkillers after 2-3 hours I should ask them from the nurses.

I was then wheeled out from the OT into the recovery bay. I was instantly covered with thick blankets and one of it came with hot air to keep me warm. I trembled non stop. The nurses said it is another side effect of the jab and I should be ok in about 30 mins. It was about 3.45pm then. I was finally wheeled out into the ward around 4+pm. Papa and his brother were waiting for me outside the OT. I was wheeled into a single bedded room. I was still energetic as I got back to the room and started calling family and friends to inform of the good news. After a few hours, the 'pain' finally kicked in....

Meet my boy

2010-11-05T21:06:00.002+08:00

Updates..

2010-11-02T20:53:00.002+08:00

Our little boy is finally here.

Name: Zachary Yew
Weight: 3.84kg
DOB: 1st November 2010

Will follow up with the experience and his photos later :-)

Waiting....

2010-11-01T12:29:00.003+08:00

I admitted into SDMC since 9.30am this morning. They shaved me, cleared my bowel, got me to fill up some forms and I am now waiting for the TIME. I think this waiting time is the most horrible in my life. Half of me is excited and the other half of me is nervous and not to mention I am hungry and thirsty. I kept staring at the clock! Dr Lee dropped by earlier to check on me and he told me that papa will not be allowed in the operating theatre, DAMN! I thought for once he could see it for himself what I have to go through, let him see how courageous I am and let him experience it all for the last time. Sigh... that is not going to happen again (the first time in Assunta and he was not allowed in as well) and I am so upset. Dr Lee said papa will get to see Bun in the recovery room and I will be wheeled out into the recovery room for about 45 mins after the surgery.

The most dreadful part of the entire process for me would be the insertion of the drip, the urine catherer and lastly the spinal anasthetic jab. Needles makes me weak. The nurses said these will happen in the OT itself. Although this was my 2nd c-sec, it was different the first time as I was wheeled in from the labour room into the OT and most of the preparation work was done in the labour room and everything happened so quickly.

I pray for courage and strength and a smooth delivery...

Out of order...

2010-10-31T16:10:00.003+08:00

Tomorrow is finally THE DAY! After all the cleaning and washing and packing, I think I am done, I hope I am done and I didn't miss anything [OCD kicking in :-)].

I am not sure how soon I will be able to get back to blogging, to write or even to read your posts. But I promise to at least try to post up some updates and photos of Bun as soon as I can.

Don't miss me too much :-).

The 3 of us, for the last time...

2010-10-27T13:43:00.009+08:00

I have always wanted to take beautiful photos of me in my last trimester and finally got the opportunity to do it this time. But because I do not have a beautiful tummy (you know how some lucky woman will have tummy with no scars like 'watermelon scars' or brown vertical lines etc), I wasn't one of them. So no sexy shots of me in tank tubes. But just a couple of family shots taken at 37 weeks for our own collection.

The photography session only lasted 50 mins as the little one lost interest pretty quickly and refused to look into the camera. It was a pretty hot day too - you can see that Hayley's hair is soaked in sweat.

We just wanted to say a huge thanks to our photographer friend Joyce Lee and my best buddy Jessie who helped made this possible. Jessie introduced Joyce to me and Joyce who did a lot of photography work for charity and publications agreed to do this huge favour for us at a discounted price. Here are some raw photos which have not been touched up yet:

Bun's last check up

2010-10-24T15:45:00.003+08:00

Saturday was Bun's last check up with Dr Lee. The next time we see Dr Lee, I will be on the operating table, naked and shivering (because of fear la) and with half of my body numbed and when it's all over I will have Bun in my arms and I will be in a lot of pain for days .... thinking of it alone is enough to cause me sleepness nights and I haven't been sleeping well in the past few nights because of the pain and because I could not find a comfortable spot - there is no comfortable spot!

I am officially off from work this week although I am still checking work emails occasionally in case my back up could not handle the 'shit' I left behind. I am trying to do a lot of last minute things such as cleaning, washing, packing, more cleaning, more washing and more packing. The weather hasn't been very co-operative, it's been raining everyday and my washing machine has been working non-stop. There seems to be no end in the things that I needed to wash and clean. I guess this is perfectly normal. I know I won't be able to clean and wash for at least a month or more so I am stressed out to get them all cleaned as much as I can now.

As of my last check up, I gained back 1 kg and current weight stands at 59.6kg. Dr Lee was delighted that I gained and he said everything is back to normal and I am ready for next Monday. Bun's head remained in the right position (ie bottom) but not engaged. Dr Lee said some babies especially 2nd pregnancies will only engage at the very last minute so it will be hard to tell if Bun will engage or not. Well, if Bun decides to come early, then we'll attempt natural based on the circumstances but if not, 1st Nov it will be.

We also managed to discuss about anasthetic with Dr Lee. Apparently there are 3 types - spinal, epidural and general anasthetic. I took the opportunity to ask him because for someone like me who has phobia towards needles, this is a BIG thing. I will even get weak knees when I had to go for my blood test and if the person drawing my blood is not skillful to do it quickly and at one go, I will faint, seriously.

Dr Lee explained that spinal is what most anasthetician would use for elective c-section, epidural injected in the empty space next to the spine is for natural birth and GA for elective c-section as well for those who would rather go to sleep during the surgery. Some anasthetician would use epidural for elective c-sec too. I had GA the first time and it was painless but the recovery was longer. I was groggy for a few hours and had to fast for 2 days and could not get down from bed for 2 days. I was told spinal would be painful when they jab into the spine but recovery would be faster. And since I am not planning for another child, I really wanted to build up enough courage to go through the surgery with a spinal jab. I wanted to see how or in this case hear how it was done. I just hope I won't chicken out at the last min.

Apart from worrying about which anasthetic to choose from and what have I not washed or cleaned, I am also constantly worried about the fact that in 4 more days I will have to manage 2 kids. Will I be able to do that? What will life be with 2 kids? How different will it be from now? I know many mothers have been through this and they survived and I will too, but I still can't stop myself from worrying and thinking too much. And you know what, we are going to put Hayley at the babysitter's for a few days when I am in the hospital and although that will only be happening in a few days, I am already feeling guilty and missing her like crazy even right now! Am I going insane or what????

The same guilt that I felt when I first found out I was pregnant that she will have to share my love with another sibling is back.... arghhh......

OK, I have to go and wash the bedsheets now.... tomorrow the curtains and strollers, Thurs the play pen.... hahaha

Heat rash attack 2

2010-10-24T15:35:00.002+08:00

The heat rash attacked my poor girl again. The first time was in August and it lasted for slightly more than a week. This time we brought her to the paed and the paed said it wasn't heat rash. It was what chinese called 'fung mok'. I am not sure what it is called in medical terms. Anyway, the paed said it was an allergy, she is either allergic to some foods or some new washing detergent or some insects etc. The paed said it was mild and asked me if I gave her any new foods in the last couple of days. I honestly cannot recall giving her anything new and I bet the babysitter would tell me the same if I were to ask her on Monday. Hayley is 2.5 and she's eating everything we eat especially when we go out, it will be very tough to monitor her food.

Anyway, I am glad we brought her to the paed as the paed prescribed her with Atarax and the moment we gave her the first dose (she needs to take 3 doses a day for 3 days) the rashes disappeared. The paed also prescribed another med to be taken once a day for 2 weeks to hopefully get rid of this allergy.

Now the hard part is monitoring the food and if we can't find the source to it and should it happen again, we might need to document her daily food intake and routine to hopefully find the culprit.

As for eating the med, now that she's older and cheekier, she knows how to say no, how to keep her mouth closed and how to run away and hide the moment we take out the med bottle. The only way we can give her the med without any hassle is to bribe her with 1 M&M chocolate. We know bribing is not good but we're glad it worked.

Bun at 36+ weeks

2010-10-15T14:53:00.002+08:00

Today we went to see our beloved Dr Lee again - getting a bit bored with all these visits and the waiting .. haha

The good news is Bun is growing well, Dr Lee predicted Bun to be at least 3.2 - 3.4kg (if not more). The circumference of Bun's head is quite big too, about the size of a 37 - 38 weeks baby. So Dr Lee said it is probably a good idea to confirm c-sec.

Our c-sec has been confirmed for 1st November at 2.30pm, just 16 more days to go [nail biting]. I probably won't be able to sleep the night before and ended up looking like a panda on 'action' day. Hopefully Bun remain co-operative and stick to our plan!

Dr Lee also said that there is a high chance that Bun might come earlier. If that happens, then we'll decide on the spot whether I should try natural or c-sec. He said if Bun's head engaged/crowned up to 40 - 50% and my cervix is about 4-5cm dilated, he would encourage me to try natural. But if Bun's head remained high and I am only about 2-3cm dilated and am experiencing labour pains, he suggested that I should just go for c-sec.

As for my weight, I lost this time. I am now at 58.9kg, lost 0.6kg in the last 2 weeks. Is losing weight even possible? I don't really know but Dr Lee said some women will lose weight closer to child birth so I should not be worried about it. But he did asked if I was sick or having diarrhea etc and said that instead of coming back in 2 weeks which will be 2 days before my c-sec, he suggested that I return for the last time next Saturday just to make sure everything is fine - he did show a concern face when he saw my current weight.. haiz...

In the last 2 weeks I also experienced the following changes:

experiencing extreme itch on my tummy, so itchy that I have to scratch even when I am in the office or driving or walking. Extremely embarassing but I can't help it :-(. Hopefully I won't end up having red watermelon looking scars all over my tummy.
my gums have also started bleeding in the last few days when I brush my teeth.
sleeping (finding a comfortable spot) and waking up is becoming more and more challenging. Sometimes Bun will kick or press against my ribs causing pain.
Bun likes to put pressure on my bladder too, very irritating.
losing appetite during certain times especially dinner is also becoming a norm - sometimes feeling nauseous after eating - maybe this is why I lost weight.
I am walking slower and slower that sometimes my colleagues will tease if they need to bring a shopping trolley to wheel me to lunch hahaha

Today we also completed pre-admission at SDMC. The costs are just scary, RM8,000 deposit, single room is RM230 per night (ala hotel standard).. hahaha

Some random shots with my Canon S95

2010-10-14T11:26:00.004+08:00

A day out to our regular park on Sunday. Photos taken using Canon S95.

P/S: Leona, this camera is very good la. You should look into getting this one.

Stocking up on herbs from EYS

2010-10-11T11:16:00.006+08:00

The moment I found out I got pregnant, my best friend asked me to make sure I stock up on some herbs from Eu Yan Sang (EYS). When she got pregnant and when her sis in law got pregnant, her mom gave them a checklist on the things they need to buy, some from EYS and some from any chinese herbs shops outside but her mom insisted that they MUST get everything on the list. She's had 1 kid, her sister in law 3 kids and they both seems to have very good health after having the kids and rarely falls sick - unlike me :-(.

So this time I decided to follow her and requested the checklist from her mom. This is what I was told to get and I got mine mostly from EYS for convenience sake:

Dang Guai and Nan Zhao (get 100 grams and divide into 4 packs), boil and drink with chicken drumstick after 10 days, drink once a week
Bak Foong pills (eat for 12 days, only start eating after menses is clear)
So Hup pills (eat for 16 days, can start immediately after child birth, once in the morning and once at night)
Astragalus slices (pak kei)
Tong sum
Red dates
Black dates
Lycium berries (kei chi)
Dried longan
Black beans (hak dao) use to boil with soup
Pak Foong Ngai (herbs for shower)

Items 1 to 3

My 30 packs of items 4 to 9 all nicely prepacked so it would be more convenient for the confinement lady to boil for me

The only 2 items I haven't bought would be item 9 and 10 which I will get later from the chinese herbs shop outside the house. The above, all from EYS cost me a hefty RM718.32 (after member's discount). Well, money aside I just hope to have better health after having Bun because I certainly do not want to be sick so often again like what I have to go through after having Hayley.

At Leona's recommendation, I also got a pack of Bo Ying Compound for Hayley just in case. I was told by EYS that I should give it to Bun as well the moment Bun is born but I am not prepared to do that. I think my breat milk will be sufficient :-)

Good bye old faithful

2010-10-10T14:56:00.004+08:00

This blog is dedicated to 'old faithful' whom we've had for the last 15 years. Papa claimed it was a her and treated her like a wife. We really didn't have the intention to change her and there were no need to as papa hardly use her but because of the growing family and the need for a more reliable car, we didn't have a choice. Papa wanted to keep her as there were hardly any trade in value but felt that it wasn't the logical thing to do. Why would we need 3 cars at home? and where on earth will we park her? And if we kept her but ended up hardly using her, we know she will become more damaged and going to the scrap shop is the last we would want for old faithful. So we decided to let her go and hopefully she will find a new and better home.

Although she's no longer with us, here are some memorable stories that will always remain in our hearts:

Papa first came to pick me up during our first date 13 years ago in her.
Papa and I and now Hayley often argued about her colour. Both Hayley and I said she was green, papa insisted that she was blue. It created many laughter.
Papa bought her when he first started working because of his previous girlfriend who insisted that a man must have a ride. When they broke up, he was heart broken and took her out for a drink and ended up throwing up in her at the back seat.
When my first car was submerged in water up to the roof while parked behind the office (many years old during one of the heaviest down pour in KL), old faithful came to my rescue.
When I was still dancing part time and didn't own a car, papa and old faithful waited for me to finish work to send me safely back home. Sometimes they waited for 30 mins, sometimes 3 hours. Although papa was showing me a sour face during the latter, old faithful greeted me with a smile :-)
When we needed to transport bulky items like a table or chair, old faithful was the one we depended on as my car (although a sedan), could not perform the job like old faithful can.
Papa had one major accident with her a couple of years back, half of the car (the front part) was gone. Papa smashed her into a tree while taking a turn in a dark alley. The windscreen was smashed and because there were no air bags papa flew out from car and was found by his friends several meters from her. Papa had to get a few stitches on his chin and legs and there were a few cuts here and there, the most obvious was the horizontal cut across his belly, but thankfully nothing major was damaged or broken. He was released from the hospital after half a day. Doctors said he was lucky but I think it was old faithful, she looked after him well. Old faithful was re-assembled again but she was never the same since then.
I looked after papa while he was recovering, feeding him and cleaning his wounds. Papa was touched and proposed a few days later. He went down on one knee although he couldn't due to the stitches and I said yes :-). Prior to that, I found the receipt to the ring in his shirt pocket while helping him with his laundry and had to pretend that I didn't see it, he didn't know about this until I told him much later [hahaha]

Thank you for all the sweet memories old faithful and most importantly thank you for looking after papa during the last 15 years and keeping him safe. You also brought us together. You will be missed and we hope you will find a new good home and we certainly hope to see you around again soon.....

We've finally decided and then.....

2010-10-06T22:53:00.003+08:00

Today, papa and I finally discussed and decided that c-sec it is. We weighed the pros and cons and made the decision. We even decided on the date and confirmed our arrangements with Dr Lee.

Then... we started hearing comments such as these.....

aiyah, why c-sec, just think positive and surely you can go for natural one... last time people where got options.. die die also natural also can
natural is good, it's a different experience, very memorable, unlike c-sec.. try it and you will know what I mean
my friend's first child also c-sec and then second one natural and she said natural is better
think positive, don't think you can't, think you can and you surely can
why waste the money, try natural la, then you can save a few thousands
last time my kid was 8 pounder and I also gave birth like that

To those who commented, I know you meant well, you meant to encourage me to try natural birth but I am not prepared to take the risk.

I am not going for c-sec because it is the easy way out. DEFINITELY NOT. I have never ever thought of that. Who would want to go under the knife if given a choice? You think c-sec doesn't come with pain??? I tried natural with my first child and because she didn't crown, I ended up suffering contractions for a couple of hours and then was told that I wasted my time and effort. Imagine my despair and my disappointment. It was not even beyond my control. My previous doctor could not explain why she didn't crown and until now I still didn't have any answers.

This time, Dr Lee said the same thing. His guess was because of my petite frame but it was just a guess. He said if Bun is about the same size as Hayley, very likely I will have the same problem. He did encourage me to try natural but he also warned me to be prepared to face the same trauma. He also warned that if I ended up using both the labor room and the OT, I will have to pay more. I am just not prepared to face the same trauma or disappointment again and we certainly do not wish to pay more.

Not only it is hard for us to make the decision, it is even harder for me to accept the fact that I am a loser. I feel like a loser because I cannot give birth to my babies naturally like most woman can, like how nature designed it or like how my mother gave birth to us or how my sister gave birth to her 2 girls. I guess I am not normal after all. The guilt alone is enough to kill me so please don't make it any worst.

Anyway, this will be the last time I am explaining my situation and I am not going to mention it anymore - I am bored of saying it over and over and yet people still don't get it. All I am asking for is just some support and understanding but if you can't do that, then please keep those comments to yourself.

Thankfully I have an understanding man by my side. He was there during the first time and he knew what I had to go through and supported my decision all along. I am so glad that I have him by my side to help me overcome my guilt.

Sad news....

2010-10-06T11:32:00.003+08:00

Yesterday and today I received 2 very sad news....

A good friend of mine is pregnant with her 2nd child. She's about a month behind me so the baby will due end Dec. This morning, I was told that she delivered yesterday, the baby at 29 weeks weighs only 1.35kg. 2 weeks ago she was complaining about having bleeding and doctor told her to rest more and I honestly didn't expect this to happen. I really hope both mummy and baby will pull through.

Again this morning I was told that another relative of mine who attempted IVF for the 5th time and finally got pregnant will also be having her emergency c-sec today, 1 month ahead of the EDD. Her gynae told her that the baby seems to be getting smaller so it is better for them to have her out and monitor her condition. What is going on? In the past I really rarely hear of cases like these but now it seems so common. Is it something we eat? or is it in the air that we breathe? I am so upset. I just hope both babies and both mummies will be ok.

This really made me appreciate more and more of what I have today....

Bun at 35 weeks

2010-10-03T16:10:00.003+08:00

2 weeks flew by yet again. On Saturday we visited Dr Lee again for my checkup. This time I gained 1kg - current weight 59.5kg. 14.5kg gained to-date.

It was a quick checkup, Bun was growing well and we didn't check Bun's weight this time. I told Dr Lee to check only at the next check up so it will be closer to due and I don't have to pay RM60 twice for this scan. It will also be easier for me to make the decision whether to opt for c-sec or natural if I knew Bun's weight at a later stage. Dr Lee said based on the size of my tummy, Bun looks 2 weeks older, ie he is hinting to me to expect Bun to be more than 3kg :-).

Dr Lee gave me some dates to choose in case I decided on c-sec. Since Bun's EDD is 10.11.10, Dr Lee suggested 30.10.10, 1.11.10, 2.11.10, 3.11.10 or 4.11.10. At this point in time, I think I will just go for c-sec due to the following reasons:

hubby strongly encourage that I go for c-sec again so I don't have to go through the trauma of attempting natural and then ended up being slaughtered if the baby won't crown again - this will also result us in paying extras for the use of labor room and also the operating theatre.
since we have Hayley at home with no maid/help, having an elective c-sec will help us plan a little better. We could make arrangements to drop Hayley at the babysitter's and prepare everything else necessary instead of going into panic mode if I suddenly experience labor pains in the middle of the night
my first was a c-sec so might as well have another c-sec since I already have a scar there
I know what to expect from a c-sec so hopefully will be able to prepare myself better - mentally and emotionally.

Of course there are a lot of disadvantages to c-secs too such as:

max 3 babies (not that I am planning of having more than 2 but you just never know)
the post surgery healing is much longer than natural birth and much more painful
movement is very restricted due to the pain for the first 2 weeks, breastfeeding while lying on my sides is almost impossible without help
won't be able to do 'urut' immediately which a lot of people say is really good and must do as soon as I can. I didn't have a single urut session after Hayley was born :-(
of course it cost a lot more too.. you're talking about RM3-4k V RM7-8k at SDMC
restrictions to certain confinement foods
more prone to infections post surgery (which I experienced 2 weeks after having Hayley)

Weighing the pros and cons, I am currently 70% leaning towards c-sec. Anyway, will decide in another 2 weeks. Hopefully I will be 100% sure by then.

I just hate making all these decisions but it is one that must be made. SIGH....

Papa's birthday and his present

2010-10-03T15:34:00.006+08:00

Papa's birthday was exactly 10 days after my birthday. For this year, I wanted to take him to Sage (fine dining restaurant) at The Gardens but unfortunately we could not find a babysitter on Saturday night and they are not open for business on Sunday and therefore I had to change my plans. I took him to Xenri (Japenese fine dining) instead which is located near Wisma Elken in Old Klang Road since we've heard a lot of nice things about this place and instead of dinner we went for lunch. All these was made possible thanks to my sister and her boyfriend Ivan who helped to babysit Hayley for a couple of hours :-).

About Xenri, I think the food was really nice but the ambience just average. Here are some of the food we ordered taken using my new Canon S95 without any touch ups :-)

Part of Papa's meal set

My set but I donated my sashimi to papa :-(

Part of papa's set - Salad

Part of papa's set - Tofu

Part of papa's set - more Sashimi (which unfortunately I could not eat)

My healty 'dragon fruit and orange juice', absolutely love it. Only RM6.90.

The birthday boy

At night, the little rascal sang her papa a birthday song and she couldn't wait to blow the candle on the cake and to have her hands on the cake. The cake is courtesy of my sis and her boyfriend (picked by Hayley)... thanks again :-)

And lastly, papa's present to himself. A brand new car! I sponsored some accessories.. haha. Well, papa ordered the car about 2 weeks ago but wasn't expecting it to arrive on his birthday but it did. Papa had to say goodbye to his old faithful of 15 years (yes he drove his previous car for 15 years) and it was a rather emotional goodbye for him. We made the very difficult decision to get a brand new car (that of course comes along with a commitment of 6 years, sigh) because of the growing family and a need for a safer and more reliable car.

My birthday and my present

2010-09-30T18:29:00.005+08:00

Firstly, I finally got my birthday present, hurray and no, it's not an IPhone 4. I am not a gadget person so I am not into new phones, my current phone is almost 4 years old and it still works so no plan to change anytime soon unless papa feels generous haha. Plus Hayley enjoys playing with my phone - listening to the music, looking at her own photos or videos so I think an old phone suits me best for now.

But I do love taking photos and because I am not prepared to carry a bulky DLSR wherever I go and papa said he is not going to help me because he is not into photography, so I have to compromise and finally decided on a new digital camera instead. So papa bought me a Canon S95 which is not yet available in Malaysia. Canon S90 is the current model available here, sold at RM1,229 during the mega sale. I bought the Canon S95 (upgraded version) at RM1,300 from Hong Kong, with the help of a kind colleague.

Isn't it a beauty? Black beauty :-). The photos are gorgeous too if compared to the ones taken using my old Canon Ixus camera which is about 3 -4 years old. I am loving this new camera and Hayley will inherit my old camera as she loves photography too :-). I have yet to take any decent photo with my new camera (still playing around with it) and will show you the output in the next few weeks.

As for my birthday, it was a day filled with errands.. haha. Papa and I left the house around 10am to find someone but the shop was not opened, then we headed off to Kinderdijk and got the spare parts for my Avent breast pump. After Kinderdijk we went to Ikea to buy the baby bath tub (I am planning to bin my old one) and stool but both product no longer available, what a disappointment. After Ikea we went for Korean BBQ lunch at Kota Damansara. The food was not good so another disappointment. After lunch we headed to Jusco to grab some more stuff for Hayley and Bun.

Papa also bought me a slice of Secret Recipe Chocolate Indulgence cake and we requested for a candle. At night, Hayley sang me my birthday song (sweetest song ever) and blew my candle for me (I pretended I didn't see the saliva.. haha). She fed me my birthday cake for the first time and I was on cloud 9 the whole night. Then we spent the rest of the night playing lanterns and candles with her outside the house.

Although the day seems simple but being a simple mom myself, I am truly happy and contented with what I have and thank God everyday for his blessing!

I indeed did have a HAPPY BIRTHDAY :-)

Happy Birthday to me!

2010-09-22T09:43:00.003+08:00

Today is my birthday. I am turning 24 (I WISH) and I am so excited... hahaha.

I am not working today and Hayley is away at the babysitter.

It will just be a simple and peaceful celebration (lunch that is) between papa and me. And hopefully we'll have some time to do some shopping later to get some new toys for Hayley to soften the guilt :-). We also need to go to Kinderdijk to get some spare parts for my Avent breast pump.

As for my birthday gift from papa, I'm getting it next week. Got a colleague to help me buy it from HK as it is slightly cheaper and they have the latest model which we don't have here yet. I can't wait :-)

And lastly, HAPPY MID AUTUMN FESTIVAL too!!!

The new 'nagging queen'

2010-09-21T16:38:00.005+08:00

My 2.5 year old have recently taken over my responsibility in the car as the nagging queen - that is whenever the papa is behind the wheel. The papa is not a very patient guy when it comes to being on the road so occasionally he does drive very dangerously even when we are in the car. He always argue that driving a little faster or taking bends without slowing down enough does not necessarily mean that he is driving dangerously.

Whenever papa drives through a bump without hitting enough of the brake and send us bouncing in the car, rascal will say 'Papa..... don't drive dangerously ok' or 'Papa please drive carefully ok'. I believe she picked this up from me.

Whenever she spotted the papa driving with 1 hand 'Papa... use 2 hands!'. She will repeat until he actually placed 2 hands on the steering wheel just to please her. I have never commented on this before so not sure where she picked it up from.

Papa is quite annoyed whenever he hears the above as she sounds exactly like me, the intonation and even the expression :-). As for me, I am just happy that she knows what is safe and what is not when it comes to driving :-)

Bun at 33 weeks

2010-09-18T13:32:00.003+08:00

So fast 2 weeks flew by. Today we went for our regular check up again.

Bun
Everything is going well and Bun has been upside down since 2 weeks ago and remained upside down. Today we managed to catch a clear glimpse of Bun's face. The nose, the lips, the face was extremely visible but we still can't tell who Bun looks like. Bun has a big nose (must be from the papa) and thick lips (must be from me) :-). Didn't look at all like Hayley when she was a baby.

Dr Lee said he will weight Bun again at week 34 to keep a close tab on the weight and help me decide by 36 weeks whether to go for a c-sec or to attempt natural.

Me
I only gained 0.5kg this time. Am extremely happy. This means 13.5kg weight gained so far. The pain down there is slowly returning and Dr Lee said it is normal at this stage and there is nothing he could do to help me. He also reminded me to sleep on my sides at night.

I also mentioned to him about the irregular heartbeat. He called it 'skipped beat'. He said some women will experience it although it is not normal. If I am still able to function like normal, ie it is not causing me extreme discomfort, I should not need to worry about it. He said some women who experienced serious skipped beat will need to wear a gadget 24 hours a day to monitor the heart beat.

I am also getting more and more tired by the day. Going up the stairs or walking long distance is becoming a challenge.

Hayley
Brought her along to the hospital again today. She was extremely naughty. Running here and there in the waiting area, touching this and that, refused to sit down even for 2 mins and making all sorts of noises. She will walk towards other babies or kids and play with them and annoyed their parents.

The funniest thing today is when we were leaving Dr Lee's office. The moment she stepped out from the room she said this 'hello everybody' while waving her hands to everyone seated in the waiting area. Sometimes we don't know if we should be angry, happy, proud or sad to have such a child! Maybe a combination of everything best described how we feel.....

Shh... Quiet!

2010-09-09T23:54:00.000+08:00

When papa and I used to chat in the car with the rascal around she will often interrupt us by talking loudly or calling me or doing all sorts of things/noises to attract my attention. She started doing those nuisances since she was much younger. Whenever she does that, I will tell her to "shh.... quiet, mummy and papa talking, you cannot interrupt, that is very rude".

After saying the same things to her a couple of times, she started picking up the first two words ie "shhh.... quiet" since young. Sometimes she will say it in a soft manner, sometimes demanding.

She will sometimes use those 2 words on me when she did something naughty and I scolded her. She will sometimes use those 2 words on me when papa and I were talking in the car trying to stop us from talking and she also uses those 2 words on me sometimes even when the situation does not require her to ie saying it for a situation that does not fit.

Today, the babysitter confronted me. She asked if we (papa and me) talk very loud at home and if we argue a lot. I told her we definitely do not argue much and we don't talk very loud at home except when we're scolding the rascal or calling for her when she run to the kitchen or to other rooms etc. The babysitter then adds that rascal got affected by us talking loudly or arguing loudly. She said they don't talk loudly at home so she must have got affected by us. That got me scratching my head, what the heck is she talking about?

Then she said yesterday while in the car, obviously her husband and her were taking rascal somewhere and they were chatting and rascal used the 2 words on her. She said it was the first time she heard it although we've heard it many many months ago. I told her not worry about it as rascal was probably just copying us and I constantly reminded her not to say those words whenever she uses it and I told the babysitter to do the same if she heard it again. The fact that she only heard it for the first time yesterday was solid proof that rascal was using the 2 words lesser than before.

The babysitter then adds again that we have to be careful with our actions and words as we will affect or scar a child badly. It will be worst when they reach 8 or 9 years old. I know she meant well but sometimes I think it is not necessary to be overly worried. Kids will be kids and they will pick up all the good and bad. As parents, of course we try our best to set the best examples but we're humans, we make mistakes too and sometimes even we don't notice when we did.

As long as our conscience is clear, I think we should not worry too much and enjoy parenthood.

Bun at 31 weeks

2010-09-07T20:36:00.003+08:00

Last Saturday it was the usual bi-weekly check up for Bun.

While waiting for our turn, the nurses took my weight and also examined my urine, as usual. I gained another 1.7kg in 2 weeks. I am now at 58kg, 13kg gained so far. Urine is normal.

After waiting for about 45 mins, it was our turn. This time Dr Lee checked the weight of Bun. Bun weighed at 1.8kg, Dr Lee said it was ideal for a 31 week old baby. At this rate, Dr Lee 'predicted' Bun to be at 2.9 or 3kg when born. So my next mission is to decide whether I want to opt for a c-sec or attempt natural birth - something that I still can't decide now as they both have their own pros and cons.

As for me, nothing much has changed since 2 weeks ago. The only new condition I have is irregular heart beat which I forgot to check with Dr Lee. Sometimes I felt uncomfortable around the heart/chest, felt like the heart was beating irregularly and the entire body felt uneasy. It doesn't hurt, maybe it felt heavy, I just don't know how to explain it. Sometimes I even think (maybe I was imagining things) that I might be having a heart attack and I would experience it several times a day.

Other than the above, and feeling heavier each day, the rest are as usual.

I have also started preparing things for the arrival such as stocking up diaper, milk bottles, washing up baby clothes, packing my bag etc. Next on the list would be to clean the cot and play pen, washing the baby car seat, preparing the guest room for the confinement lady and also stocking up on herbs.

Just me

2010-09-03T18:08:00.006+08:00

Last Sat I attended a friend's wedding in Cyberjaya. We used to dance together and I was really looking forward to the night as I will be able to meet some of my dancer friends - reminiscing the good old times.

I went alone, no hubby and no baby for the night. So I got to talk with friends and eat in peace and enjoy the night fuss free.... :-). Oh boy how I missed moments like these...

Dancers and spouses/partners.. some retired

Retired dancers who now became mummies...

Evon on my right has 2 kids, a 9 year old boy and a 3 year old girl

May on my left has 3 kids, a 6 year old girl, a 3 year old girl and a 9 months old boy

And of course me in the middle, with a 2.5 year old girl and a 30 weeks old Bun :-)

Toilet independent

2010-08-27T09:02:00.003+08:00

Just wanted to put this into the record that my little rascal at 2 years and 6 months old is finally independent to go to the toilet on her own supported by a stool. Of course this is only for the small business and not the big business :-).

She will stand on the stool to gain enough height to sit herself on the adult toilet (without a child toilet seat cover) and then balances herself holding the sides of the toilet while she completes her business. Once done she will climb down on her own, grab some toilet paper and wipe herself clean. Then she complete it with a 'flash'! Yes, that's how she pronounce 'flush' despite us teaching her over and over.

We are so proud of her :-)

Bun at 29 weeks or 7 months

2010-08-24T13:03:00.004+08:00

Had our monthly check up last Saturday and surprisingly it wasn't crowded (maybe Dr Lee wasn't that popular :-)). Reached the hospital around 9.45am and this time we brought Hayley along again to let her see the baby and we were done by 10.30am. As usual she was very excited and she got even more excited when Dr Lee gave her a chocolate and then another one as he promised as she was well behaved during the scan.

As for Bun, everything looks normal and good although the head was still on top. It was a quick routine scan. As for me, I gained another 3kg (oh shucks!) and I am now at 56.3kg, 11.3 kg gained. Dr Lee said anything between 12 - 15kg in total is considered normal. Looking at the rate I am going, I think I will become 'abnormal' at the end of it. I really should start watching my diet from now on (say only but can never resist the ice cream, donuts, murtabak chicken).... hahahaha...

Since the last check up a couple of things have changed in me.

The pain I mentioned in my previous post here is getting so much better. At least now I could walk without being in a lot of pain. It only hurts once in a while now especially when I have walked too much or when I am too tired or when I toss and turn in bed. Otherwise not so much pain.. so that was a huge relieve.
My tummy is also getting a lot bigger. Everyone who bumps into me (even strangers) will ask if I am due soon cause they said it looks huge and very low [nail biting].
I find it challenging to stand up after sitting on the floor. Even when I am seated on the chair I can feel the bump directly resting on my thighs. Don't remember feeling these when carrying Hayley, at least not until the last month.
Both my feet (around the calves) started to swell more than a month ago. The calves felt very hard and tensed. Even when I walk I can feel the calves hardened like I will be getting a cramp soon that kind of feeling. Dr Lee said the swelling could be caused by me sleeping on my back as he said sleeping on my back will reduce oxygen flow to the legs causing swelling and varicose veins as well as cramps. It won't be good for the baby too. I have been sleeping on my back since the pain down there started to avoid having to toss and turn but I have now started sleeping sideways despite the pain and hopefully the swelling will go away soon.
I have had 2 cramps so far, both times on my right leg. They happened in the middle of the night and I suffered in silence... sob sob
I am also feeling more pain around the tummy. Sometimes when Bun stretches ie when you see the tummy turning into an odd shape, it hurts. I had to stop doing whatever I was doing until the pain is gone as it really hurts. Don't know if these are called 'Braxton Hicks' contractions. I sometimes feel it a few times a day more so at night.
The midnight need to go to the loo is still ongoing. Sometimes after going to the loo, I won't be able to fall asleep until 2 hours later hence waking up in the morning feeling very tired.
I get lower back ache if I sleep on my back. Thankfully they only last for a while.

We still have not decided whether we will go for a normal or c-sec delivery. Dr Lee suggested checking the weight of Bun the next round which will be in 2 weeks. He said if Bun is between 2.8 - 3kg, I could still attempt a normal delivery but if Bun is going to be as heavy as Hayley (3.4kg) or around there, he would suggest a c-sec as he foresee that I will encounter similar problems ie baby not crowning due to my petite size (small bum). I am leaning towards c-sec as of now as I definitely do not want to go through the labour pains and then c-sec post surgery pains all over again.

Help! My daughter got heat rash!

2010-08-19T20:29:00.003+08:00

Since Sunday we noticed some rashes around Hayley's feet and body. They looked like blisters or small mosquito bites or Chinese called it 'fung mok'. Some appeared in patches, some just one or two. Sometimes they even appear on the face. The heat rash will appear out of the blue and then suddenly disappears. Initially we though it was food allergy but we did not recall giving her anything strange or new prior to the symptoms.

After monitoring her for a few days, we noticed that she will get the rashes more when she was hot ie in the afternoon and they will apparently get better after she has had her bath.

Both the babysitter and my mother said not to worry about it as they are just heat rash and will go away in a few days. My mom who was an ex nurse asked me to apply some calamine lotion when the patches appear. The rashes doesn't seem to bother Hayley as well.

Today is Thursday (5 days after the first symptom) and the babysitter said she is still getting the rash in the afternoon. When we took her home in the evening, only a few could be seen, probably because it was cooler in the evening.

What should I do now? How long more do I have to wait before I have to bring her to a doctor? My mom said there is nothing the doctor could do, they probably will prescribe some cream or some medicine to treat the itch. Have anyone else experience this before? Is there any other home remedy that I could try?